Marks
by Kurai-Tenshi of Doom
Summary: Actually a story, I admit. After thier first tryst in the shower, Sephiroth comes to realise that marking Cloud is the first and hopefully not last step to his redemption, but how can he when everything he follows forbids it? This is good!
1. Pt 1

Marks

AN1: Well. This is my first lemon. And, coincidentally my first one-shot. Please, oh please, oh please, I beg you don't flame me. Constructive criticism (this means NICE suggestions for all those who don't understand) is accepted. I don't think this is all too good, but I wanted to experiment. So here it is. Oh, and it's definitely NC-17. And just for the record, yaoi means boys doing boys pretty much so please don't flame me for that, of all reasons. After all, you clicked the link to this stoopid. Okay. Wish me luck!

(….. POV change, it starts with Cloud and switches to Seph, to Cloud etc. Sorry if it confuses you…--;)

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……………

Cloud sighed and shifted the towel around his waist. Today had been harsh; his body was testament to that. He pulled the hair-tie from his short spikes and let them literally poof into place. He listened to his bare feet flop on the tile floor as he made his way into the shower-room. It was late; he had slept before taking his shower, so he was alone in the bathing room. He often preferred that, as he'd noticed his showers had been invaded once or twice by other more frisky SOLDIER cadets, more or less purposefully. He had rejected all advances though; he was fixated on one man and only one. But if that man ever noticed his affection he doubted. Either that or he shrugged it off. After all, he was only a low-ranking cadet; what could he offer the great General? Nothing. That's what.

Zack had told him many-a-time he was attractive, and that was why he had so many admirers, especially male. But his self-esteem had always been low, which is why he only saw himself as a lanky blonde pipsqueak, somehow long-limbed and short at the same time. A practical freak. He never noticed his strong, yet gentle-from-youth features, the amazing sparkle to his yet-un-Mako-ed eyes, or the long sooty lashes that drew you in deeply and left you slightly hazy, or the lush lips with the attractive and smooth neck moving into a not-so-muscled-yet-strong chest. His waist was narrow and slim, giving him a fragile appearance. He had long legs, and stumbled over them occasionally, but when he was unaware he possessed an unrefined eloquent beauty that caught many eyes and held them in brimming lust.

He never noticed those many lust-filled eyes drawn to his practice sessions hoping to glimpse the smooth, honeyed, nicely tan skin poking out through the drab SOLDIER uniform. Cloud was, in essence, oblivious to it all. So oblivious, that, somehow, his innocence was his most attractive feature; if only for others' need to corrupt it.

He turned the water on and hissed when it was too hot and burned his already slightly red skin. He adjusted it and carried on with his mechanised shower.

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…….

The Great General Sephiroth was in great unrest. As of late he'd found himself commonly outside of the cadet rooms when wandering, or showing up far too often to the training sessions. His anger and frustration was narrowed onto one small, spiky-haired, blonde cadet. The seventeen-year old was oblivious to the attention he received, of that he was sure. But as Sephiroth paced outside of the rooms he felt the need in him growing.

It had all started one fateful day he had attended cadet lessons as a way to kill time and he had been drawn to a rather clumsy and un-skilled cadet. The boy was beautiful in motion, and yet, somehow he messed every movement up; this amused the General. He came back later to observe the boy more, and found even when not in motion he obtained a kind of attention-grabbing aura. Lust was what he drew and his damn innocence vexed the General even more. Such a beautiful body, complimented by soft features and glittering eyes. He was entranced by the boy's collarbone and the graceful curve of his neck. Something in his chest twinged when he thought of marking the boy.

His pacing stopped. These feelings were far too intense. He had to find Zack; Zack had been a long-time confidant, perhaps the only human Sephiroth considered a somewhat friend. He knew Zack was familiar with the boy; he'd seen them together. He knew they roomed together as well. It could be a perfect coincidence to see the boy. He tried not to excite himself to see him, but it was hard. He had images of the boy writhing beneath him, screaming his name in pleasure and Sephiroth wasn't as unnerved by these images as so much by the fact that he wouldn't mind that every night for the rest of his life. And the fact that he knew nothing about the boy except his name, Cloud Strife, along with the fact that he couldn't suppress and control these urges. He found no other form of venting did the trick. It was always the boy who came back to his mind. He felt if he didn't at least see him, get a picture of him in his mind, he would burst.

Driven to momentary madness, Sephiroth became like a predator hunting its prey. Zack was asleep when he entered the dorms. He used his infamous stealth not to disturb him at first but then he was tempted to wake the man, and reached out to do so, but stopped when Zack's eyes opened suddenly and he whispered: "Check the bathrooms'." Sephiroth coloured slightly as Zack smiled knowingly and shut his eyes again. "Glad it's you…" he whispered again as Sephiroth whirled out of the room in a wisp of silver hair.

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He fumed slightly in the hallway. How had Zack known? Was he so transparent? Then he looked down to himself. The ceremonial garb fitted him, his trade-mark uniform. Did he look all right? Was he desirable to the boy? Would he accept him? Sephiroth had never experienced doubt in this area before, so it was easier for him to push aside. He decided he would not let the boy refuse him at this point. Then he realised it sounded as if he were going to rape him. '_No, I will not take something unwillingly given._' he thought firmly. Then his slight insanity took over. Just to see him…he almost ran down the hallway to the bathrooms. His tormentor wasn't in the bathrooms or changing rooms, so he crossed to the showers.

He noticed a uniform on the ground and just before he opened the door to the separate cubicle showers became aware he may find the boy in a most amusing position. Steam rose in the shower room and he noticed it came from the cubicle second from the end. He didn't say anything as he approached it. Doubt plagued him again, but his need to at least see the boy, despite the fact he was naked, disturbed him even more then this new feeling.

He arrived at the stall and almost lost all rational thought. He hadn't thought of the shady plastic cover on the cubicles, giving him a shadow profile of his object of desire. He felt his feet growing roots to the spot as he watched the younger boy run his hands through flat hair, loosing its spikes in the water. It actually made him look more enticing when it was long…'_I cannot resist this!_' Sephiroth's thoughts called out. He wasn't aware of himself throwing the door open and hearing the gasp from the boy. He also wasn't aware of himself stepping into the cubicle and shutting the door. The rest, however, is very vivid to him….

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………….

Cloud heard the door to the showers open, and he sighed, disappointed in having his solitary shower ruined. He rinsed the shampoo from his hair and then settled on running his hands through the now flat and long-to-the-nape-of-his-neck silky locks. The footsteps ended at his stall. Cloud froze. Those were the sound of boots, not bare feet. He was about to whip around and look, but his shower door was thrown open and he spun around, his hair flying into his face finding he met with the most unexpected, glorious sight he'd ever seen.

No-one but the Great General Sephiroth placed himself inside the cubicle and wondrously close to a very naked Cloud. He felt the gasp, from himself or Sephiroth he would never know, but in the next moment, long-fingered alabaster hands were grabbing him and clasping him into a slowly-wetting, slightly bare chest poking through the coat. He wouldn't be able to ever pick his jaw up off the floor. What was going on? Was he still asleep?

"G-General?" he stuttered, horribly confused. Then he was released and the Great Sephiroth took a step back, looking shaken and wet and confused himself. And somehow, still so wonderfully beautiful. "I'm sorry, I was just…" But he could find no plausible excuse, so he shut up and opened the door of the cubicle again. He meant to flee, Cloud saw that and he felt in him as well his only chance to prove his, dare he say it, love for his superior. He had come to him, did that mean something? Cloud would die rather then not find out. Sephiroth exited the cubicle and was three paces away when Cloud jumped out after him.

"Wait!"

And he grabbed his mentor's leather sleeve. He had little strength compared to Sephiroth, but his tug stopped the tall angel in his tracks. He kept his back to Cloud, but he knew he was listening. Taking a deep breath, Cloud dropped his sleeve, sure he was going nowhere, and moved to the front of him. He met his eyes, but the General looked away, moving his whole head to the far right. Cloud spread his arms wide in a welcoming gesture and tried to smile up at him, hoping his brimming fear of rejection wasn't apparent, and said in a slightly shaky voice: "Were you looking for me?" When Sephiroth remained stoic to his open suggestion Cloud reached his hand upwards, so far up it felt, and brushed against the man's cheek. He felt him tense.

"Please, I watch you every moment I can, I think I-" his breath caught. "I think I love you." His confession was unbidden, rushed and done out of horrible fear and insanity, but Sephiroth barely flinched. "Please put some clothes on." Cloud noticed his fists were clenched and his voice sounded forced. He felt his heart crash and break. He was not here for him; it had been some kind of mistake. It had to have been, he scolded himself, why would the Great Sephiroth ever want him?

He lowered his hand dejectedly and prepared to leave, turning. "If you don't…" Sephiroth next words stopped him cold. "If you don't I'll touch you too much, hell, I'll probably take you on the damned for all your accursed innocence I want so badly. And yet I find when I don't control it thoughts of you haunt my mind, your soft face your glittering eyes, your sweet body…I don't know why you haunt me, but I know that I want to have you with every fiber of my being." He seemed reluctant of his admittance, but not ashamed.

Cloud took advantage of this and moved back in front of him. He spread his arms again. "General, please, just-" He was cut off as Sephiroth snapped in that moment. Like a bowstring pulled much too tight, suddenly he had his arms around Cloud and was pulling him into his wet chest and his mouth descended onto his. Cloud gasped into Sephiroth's lips and his open mouth was an invitation Sephiroth anxiously took. His tongue was inside Cloud's warm, sweet mouth instantly, almost drinking him like a dehydrated man. Cloud was new to all of this and he found his lips would bruise fast.

Sephiroth's hands did not stay dormant either. They slipped over Cloud's chest quickly finding the hardening nubs and rubbing them softly, then harder. Cloud gasped again and shut his eyes with the newfound pleasure. His tongue gently responded to Sephiroth's attack on his mouth. The older man growled in pleasure. He finally pulled away and Cloud and himself panted for air. "I'm sorry, I've never-" Sephiroth shushed him. "I'll make up for it, don't worry." He soothed the flustered Cloud, pulling him back to the still-flowing shower cubicle, door flung open in Cloud's haste and threw him back into the water, stopping before entering to remove his jacket and, albeit jerkily, his boots.

…….

He stepped into the water, causing Cloud to hit the wall opposite, and ran his hands through his silver mane, pushing it back from his face. Cloud gaped. "What?" he asked slightly apprehensive of the blonde's apparent awe. "You're so beautiful." Cloud whispered. Sephiroth tried not to let this affect him, but it did and a small smile escaped onto his lips. "Don't be modest." He said voice low as he advanced on the slightly trembling boy. He was pleased with the boy's already apparent reaction and he took his shoulders gently and turned him around, bringing him roughly against his body. The boy gasped as he felt Sephiroth's erection on his back. Sephiroth chuckled, in an almost sinister manner into his ear.

"Let's clean you up a bit, eh _uke_?" he whispered into his still flat locks and took hold of the shampoo quickly squirting it into his hair. Cloud soon found himself moaning under Sephiroth's seducing fingers. He never knew washing his hair could be so sensual, but he made it so. The boy grabbed at Sephiroth's hips and wiggled his body against his. The older man moaned slightly at Cloud's unknown seduction. Then the older man forced him back into the spray and kissed him softly this time, letting the younger boy slip his clumsy tongue into his mouth and explore. The silver-haired man egged him on with moans and growls.

His hands rinsed the shampoo from the boy's hair, pulling him tighter and tighter against him. Finally he was rinsed and Sephiroth broke their kiss to trail a few nibbles and kisses down his jaw line and neck. He pushed the boy against the wall. His hands rested on his sensitive hips, so gentle! He could crush him! Finally his lips met his nipple and he took it into his mouth gently, sucking and teasing, eliciting gasps and moans from Cloud. He finally moved down, as the boy and himself slid down the wall. Eventually the boy's legs opened to receive Sephiroth between them.

Sephiroth kissed his lower abdomen and moved down. When he met his member, he laid a kiss on the tip making Cloud gasp and finally open his eyes. "General, what are you-?" "Call me Sephiroth." He scolded mockingly before he enveloped the boy. Cloud cried out and went rigid. Sephiroth's movements along with licking and biting mixed pain with pleasure. Soon Cloud was thrusting his hips in time with his movements. Then he cried out again and spilled into his mouth. Sephiroth licked his lips and then kissed an exhausted Cloud.

He unbuttoned his pants and slid them down. Cloud pulled away from the kiss and smiled in a lusty manner. "May I?" he didn't wait for permission, but grabbed Sephiroth in both hands. It was Sephiroth's turn to gasp at the virgin's surprise eagerness. Cloud attempted a clumsy repeat of what Sephiroth had just done for him, first slowly until Sephiroth growled to him: "Faster!" Then Cloud obliged, moving fast and hard. Sephiroth soon came apart under his hands and when he released Cloud smiled and licked his fingers. Sephiroth panted and watched him, eyes on fire in lust with Cloud's wonderfully enticing seduction.

Cloud kissed him again, this time he took advantage of Sephiroth's weakened state to dominate the kiss and Sephiroth was enticed that he could taste himself mixed in with Cloud's honeyed taste. His hands moved down to memorise every curve of the younger boy's elegant body, to remember every inch. Cloud's own hands rubbed the General's broad shoulders before he broke away and whispered in a slightly hoarse voice: "I want more." Sephiroth looked deep into his eyes, trying to determine if he was ready. He knew he was barely able to resist, but he didn't want to scare the boy off. Then again all he could determine from his glittering and enrapturing eyes love and trust. This unsettled him as much as it thrilled him.

"Lay down." Sephiroth whispered into his ear and felt him shiver. The boy did as he was told; only having to inch slightly lower so his shoulder blades now supported his body on the tile wall. "Comfortable?" he asked, an almost sarcastic grin on his face. Cloud looked nervous and slightly frightened, but he nodded all the same. Sephiroth gave him a reassuring smile that was rusty from misuse and Cloud looked slightly awed for a moment before he tried to hide it looking slightly embarrassed.

Sephiroth pressed his lips to Cloud's again and tried not to feel too guilty as the boy gasped in pain as two of Sephiroth's fingers slid inside him, attempting to open a too tight opening. He squirmed as Sephiroth placed another finger and then another until gasps and moans came instead of yips of pain. Sephiroth was satisfied at this point and he took Cloud's long, beautiful legs and placed them on his shoulders. "This will hurt, but I promise I will make it better." He then kissed his blonde angel as his eyes opened and stared up at him.

He felt his heart pounding in this moment for many different things; the final fulfilment of the torturous lust for the boy, the wonderful taste of him, knowing he was the first one to ever see him like this, and for some reason, observing the amazing faith the boy placed in him and the way his eyes glimmered in, again, that confounded love and admiration. And hope there was that too.

Pushing all of this from his slightly hazy mind Sephiroth eased slowly into the boy, almost loosing all control when he felt how tight he was. Cloud almost screamed in agony, but Sephiroth's lips were quickly over his. His years and years of military training were the only thing that kept him from ravishing the poor virgin, writhing beneath him, and he instead used his strong tongue to ravish his mouth to mimic what he wished he could do to him instead. After a few moments of just staying inside him, Sephiroth pulled out and slid in again, this time loosing a bit of his control and pushing in all of himself.

Cloud's gasp of pain was heard as he pulled away from the sweet, pliant mouth and bit his lips. He remained as he was until Cloud wiggled his body slightly in anticipation. He opened his eyes and eyed the boy. He gazed up at him with those innocent eyes and nodded. Sephiroth understood and pulled out, diving in again to the hilt. Cloud's gasp was not as apparent as Sephiroth repeated his actions and soon the boy was crying out in ecstasy when Sephiroth hit that special spot. He hit it again and again, memorizing it like the rest of the soft, perfect body beneath him, and soon lost himself as he plunged in again and again.

He hit his climax, but not before grabbing Cloud and making sure he followed. Cloud screamed his name, for the first time and as he rode the waves of pleasure that scrambled his very atoms he relished hearing it on those wonderful red lips. When his breathing slowed, he pulled out and pulled the gasping boy into his lap. He curled into him like a kitten and Sephiroth kissed his hair.

He eyed his pants sopping wet and just to the side of them, and tried not to think of how he was going to get back to his room. Finally he realised the boy was breathing deeply again and was twirling a lock of his silver, slightly matted hair from the shower, around his long fingers. Sephiroth pulled back from him slightly and looked down into a sweet face and jewel-rivaled eyes.

"You said my name." he whispered. A bright, yet tired, smile broke onto the boy's face. "I hope that was good enou-" Sephiroth cut off his words with a soft kiss. "Don't doubt yourself so much _uke_." He whispered. And then he remembered his fantasy. To mark this object of desire so many others' lusted after. And yet he had been the first. What had given him such an honour? How was he, the jaded, frightening General Sephiroth, deserving of this innocent love? No, he could leave no marks, so much as he desired to. No-one could know about this night, no-one but himself and the boy. He suddenly felt very cold. Cloud seemed to sense his sudden change and worry etched his brow.

He kissed Sephiroth's neck and trailed downwards, taking his time in relishing the taste of his skin and the feel of it under his bruising lips. His lingering kisses soon reminded the man of their predicament. "I suggest we take a shower, eh _uke_? We're in the right place after all." The boy smiled up at him and nodded, allowing Sephiroth to help him stand. Cloud briefly wondered what would come of this.

……..

If this was all real and he woke up tomorrow remembering all of it, how would he live with the consequences? He too pushed his worries away in light of the moment. Damn tomorrow, if it meant giving him tonight.

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AN2: Well, there it was. I hope you liked it. And if you liked it that much, I could give you another along the same lines. Hell, I have ideas for this to even be a story. Filled with tons o lemons ;) Okay, well, even if you say: "Good do more." Leave me something, or even "Fix this- etc." I'll like it. Review, but no harsh flames please! Oh, and if you lovelovelovelovelovelovelove angsty, well-written slightly-cute, but not ficcies of Cloud-kun and Sephie-kun then you mustmustmustmust read Fusion by Knowing Shadows. It's like heroin, it's so addicting seriously, and she is an amazing writer. But read mine first so you're not comparing :P Hope to see you again!

Love and Peace,

-Kurai-Tenshi of Doom


	2. Pt 2 Honey

Marks

Part Two:

Honey

WARNING: Contains very explicit content, sex, drugs, death, people sacrificing virgins, cannibalism, so forth, so forth. As a reminder: YAOI MEANS HOT STICKY GUY-GUY SEX! THERE IS SOME OF THE AFOREMENTIONED IN THIS PIECE OF FICTION! (AS IN I OWN NOTHING) So don't be retarded and flame me because I think two (attractive) guys making out and etc. isn't weird. And neither does anyone else who reads this. So I have posse! So don't flame me! We'll sick our bishies on you! Gackto- AWAY!

(Not mine, don't sue, PLEASE don't sue)

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Cloud groaned as awareness crept back to him in the form of a pounding headache and several body pains. "Cloud-o-kunnn…" "Go away." is what he had meant to say, but the bit of pillow lodged in his mouth stopped coherent speech. "Guess you really are a pillow biter." This had him up, and as he threw back the sheets, twisted his long body around into a recognisable position, he glared at the person who had dared to awaken him from the lovely dream of a rather euphoric experience in the showers.

"Zack, I'm going to destroy you!" he growled, teeth bared. Zack lounged on the edge of his cot, legs crossed and smiling largely. "Good thing I know well enough to recognise that your ferocity is the key to your love." "Get off my bed you wench." Cloud answered, using the usual indifference he supplied to Zack's rambunctious behaviour.

"What's that mark on your back?" Zack asked as way of response to Cloud's insult, which may have been more truth then insult. Cloud's too-blue eyes widened in shock and he reached an arm around his back. When his splayed fingers felt the bruise the shape of his fist he hissed between his teeth in pain.

"What did you do last night?" Zack wiggled his eyebrows, but Cloud shot up from the bed, streaking through the already-deserted dorm room and making his way to the doors that led to the bathrooms. Once inside he slammed the door and looked at himself in the full-length mirror hanging precariously on the thick door. This bathroom was meant for everyone in his dorm and it had a shower, but it had long since been destroyed by one prank or another.

He pulled off the boxers that hung low on narrow hips and looked himself over. There was something different about him. He couldn't place exactly what it was, but there was something different. And the bruise on his back. He turned around and craned his head over his shoulder in attempts to try and capture it with his eyes.

He did and was astonished to see it had the un-refined shape of a faucet head. Like ones' found in the showers. "No…" he gasped, not willing to believe it. Granted he had never had a dream that specific and descriptive, but still, the possibilities of it having actually happened were so small! He was a lowly cadet, and he, the Great General! Things like this did not happen, ever!

His common sense deserted him for a moment as his mind called back the wonderful feel of Sephiroth's skin…the man was just too beautiful. No! Focus! He had to get to the bottom of this! He pulled the boxers back on and tried to recall anything after…the showers. Getting to his bed, or even exiting the showers, was nowhere in his mind. The last thing he remembered was having the General clean his exhausted body.

As he turned to look at the bruise again a searing pain shot up his back and pulsed thickly. Had they really…? Lips open slightly, eyes dreaming, his fingers traced the mark. Had his first time really been with the too-ethereal General? Did miracles really come true? He had pined over him as so many others' had since first glimpsing him at a meeting for cadets at the initiation ceremony; he had been standing near the President as he gave a speech. He had seemed distracted, after all he was General Sephiroth, and his mere presense was enough to set anyone off.

Yet Cloud had sensed something from him; he had been able to see through the fragile, cold exterior. There was someone beneath there, someone who was capable of love, capable of dreams, capable of being _normal_. There had been thousands of whispers throughout the time Cloud had been here of the General; years of torture at the demented hands of Hojo, an odd sort of feeling he gave others', how cruel he had been to them.

But Cloud had never been willing to believe Sephiroth was naturally cold and cruel. He was just aloof, and misunderstood. There was something about him most just didn't understand and they turned their fear into jealousy. But Cloud had understood, he idloised him ever more because of their seemingly kindred understanding.

Cloud shook his head and supposed he wouldn't know if anything had happened until he spoke with Sephiroth face to face. But when would he ever be able to do that? The General wasn't just walking around Shin-Ra. It would be near impossible. Sighing in defeat, he slipped back into the boxers and slipped from the bathroom to meet Zack's slightly bewildered gaze. He lowered his head, letting his spikes cover his face.

"Bad dream." He whispered, hoping his lie wasn't too apparent. Zack's grin let him know it was more then apparent.

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Cloud grumbled to himself as he glowered at the instructor who was screaming punishments into his face for being almost five minutes late. He wanted so desperately to say he had been wrapped around the Great General all night, and this had caused his tardiness, but unsure if such a thing had actually happened, he kept it to himself. Instead, as he moved through the exercises, he found himself lost in images of Sephiroth's face warped in ecstasy in the most erotic manner.

He was embarrassed to find he had gotten himself a little worked up. As the warm-ups turned into full-out fighting between pairs Cloud was surprised to find he fought with a bit more grace when his mind was elsewhere and he wasn't constantly focused on doing well. He supposed he did have the talent, he was just un-sure of how to apply it.

As the remembrance of Sephiroth's skillful lips closing around him re-entered his mind he became aware his partner was telling him that they were done. This was his only session for the day, so he told the other young man to go on ahead and continued practising strokes with the wooden practise sword. He was alone in the gym.

It was a small affair, a cube-shaped room with a slightly shaded viewing glass near the entrance in which superior officers could sit or rest. Cloud felt shivers rocket up his spine as he became aware someone was watching him. He stopped his follow-through and turned towards the viewing room.

A tall, imposing figure coated the small room in a stuffy sense of intimidation, and Cloud knew that aura all too well. His face flushed twelve kinds of red before he met the chilly almost-aqua eyes of the man he had made passionate love to only the night previous.

There was nothing in Sephiroth's emotions to show he acknowledged Cloud. He seemed, if anything, wistful and aloof. As he always was. Cloud was far too entranced by the power and magnetism in his eyes to become aware of the fact that he was mouthing something on thin, beautiful lips. Then again, everything about him was too beautiful for compare.

Everything of the possibly-real night before came back to him and Cloud blushed deep crimson. He couldn't get his naked, glorious body from his mind. It was just too un-forgettable. Sephiroth looked as if he were fighting something. Cloud watched him fight his inner battle between warmth and cold in his eyes and was saddened to see the cold win.

Then he cast him a slightly regretful look and turned and left the viewing room. Cloud called out softly after him, perhaps not fully aware he couldn't hear him. But the man was already gone in a wisp of silver hair. Cloud had a horrible feeling that their meeting was somehow final. He left his things as they were and rushed out of the exercise room. It was no use, he had disappeared.

He instead switched directions and headed off to find the only other man who knew Sephiroth's odd patterns as well as Sephiroth himself.

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Zack bit off the piece of noodle that had been hanging rather ungracefully from his gaping mouth as he stared at a panting disheveled Cloud. "I dunno, what am I his keeper?" There was no anger behind his response, so Cloud goaded the older man, who negated repeatedly until at least all the other SOLDIER had left the cafeteria.

"All right, all right. Here's what I know. He went off on some secret mission thing. Secret as in I know nothing specific." "Now let me eat my soba in peace." He added grumpily. Cloud knew he didn't mean it, but he was barely paying him any mind anyways. His heart had just sunken into his feet. He was going away. Who knew for how long? It could be months. He may not see him again until the exams! They were in just a few short weeks and then Cloud would be an official SOLDIER.

Then he would see him more often, but would he have to wait that long? He gnashed his teeth, praying whatever it was wouldn't keep him long. Cloud needed to know if that night had been real, or just a wonderfully fabricated dream. It would haunt him forever now. Well, at least what would feel like forever….

………….

Sephiroth didn't know what had guided him to the training rooms. He had vowed after that one night he would need to stay away from the _uke_, but every time he closed his eyes visions of his writhing body and euphoric face haunted him; every time he lost focus his ears would fill with the boy's moans, and there was nothing he could do to drown it out.

He had been dazed and distracted in his offices all morning, so he had gone for a short walk around Shin-Ra to watch less powerful figures squirm in his passing presense. Such amusement. Then his feet, his ultimate betrayers, had him just down the corridor from the cadets training. He knew the _uke_ had a lesson now.

Again a gasp of pleasure and a moan echoed inside his mind, but he pushed it aside (for all the good that did him) and he marched more determinedly towards the observation room. Once inside he took a deep breath and faced the glass. A hiss, somewhere between expectation and reluctance, left his pursed lips. Of course, fate was kind enough to give him the boy alone.

Sephiroth had moved to leave, but the boy's movements captured him; no, he was not a boy, somewhere between that awkward phase of manhood and teenager, finding the first foot-holds in an adult world.

His body was that of a seventeen year old, but Sephiroth could see something in him, had seen it last night as he had floated into oblivion with the _uke_ that there was some spirit inside of him that burned ferociously and passionately enough to be called adulthood. He had so much potential, in everything, if he only stopped _worrying_ long enough to do something about it.

He seemed to be focusing intensely on something, and when he wasn't obsessed over how horrible he was at it, he did a rather nice job. Sephiroth watched as muscles moved with eloquence and grace beneath the ceremonial garb of cadets and remembered how beautiful that body was when unclothed. Sephiroth had the insane urge to taste that body again- knew he could not live without it. He was highly addictive and highly delicious. It was the taste of honey.

Sephiroth closed his eyes in rapture. Sweet, sweet honey. Then the boy shivered. He knew he was there. He turned around slowly and when his wonderfully deep blue eyes widened in surprise at seeing the General watching him and then that confounded look he always seemed to save just for him. An odd mixture of respect, awe, and trust. What had he done to deserve such a look? Such feelings from so pure a thing?

The _uke_ pursed his lips and Sephiroth had to breathe deeply to stop from smashing the damned glass and re-capturing those lips he had dreamed of all morning. He mouthed, whether consciously or not, "I'll miss you honey _uke_…" It took all of his willpower as the blonde's pleading eyes reached out towards him to turn away and leave to prepare for his mission to the outskirts of Kalm to investigate renegade attacks. He would be away for almost a month.

Could he go that long without honey? He hoped so.

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(A month later)

(Clichéd, I know, but this is a drawn-out one-shot, we need to pick things up a bit ;) )

…………………………..

It had been almost a month. Cloud could barely believe it. He had gone a whole month without his "craving" as Zack had laughingly dubbed it. His _seme_ had been away for so long. Cloud counted every day in his mind like a new scar in his soul.

He still was left to guesses when it came to "that night". He was unwilling to believe it had been real, only because of the probability, but it had been far _too_ real not to have happened. He stared at himself in the mirror. He tried fixing his spikes, to no avail. He inspected his lanky body. Long limbs, slightly muscled, but overall not a body built for SOLDIER. Perhaps to be a street whore, but not SOLDIER. As if he would let that stop him.

Cloud smiled and checked his face. Clear of blemishes, courtesy of his mother's genes, and slightly tanned skin. He frowned slightly. What could the General see in him? Sighing dramatically he decided not to tread that ground quite yet.

He was expected back any day now. At least he should be. Who knew, it wasn't as if anyone had any control over the man. He was completely and utterly in his own limits, he worked by and set his own rules. President Shinra as his boss was only a vaguely conceived illusion, and everyone knew it.

"Cloud hurry your pointy-ass up! You'll be late for the meeting!" Zack's voice broke through Cloud's thoughts and he took one last grudging look into the mirror before he trudged from the bathroom almost dejectedly. There was supposed to be some kind of meeting for the cadets, some kind of informational thing for the looming exams.

All the higher level SOLDIERS were showing up; almost like some kind of warped pep rally. Cloud allowed himself to stay lost in his thoughts as Zack chattered happily all the way to the meeting and finally broke away from Cloud to go sit with the higher levels.

Cloud let himself slide in with the crowd of cadets who were all talking amongst each other almost happily and excitedly. There was a small stage set up with a podium. An important-looking man Cloud didn't recognise stepped up after a few moments and waited for everyone else to quiet. They did and all eyes turned to him expectantly. '_He looks like a Turk…_' Cloud thought as he tuned the man's droning voice out.

As he gazed into space and his mind drifted to thoughts of silver hair and pale skin, surprisingly (note sarcasm), Cloud heard someone next to him whisper all-too excitedly: "It's the General!" This had Cloud's rather escapable attention. His eyes darted to the stage and found him as if he were a beacon on darkness. He stood out like that amongst other commoners.

His eyes riveted to the man who had haunted his dreams and waking thoughts constantly for a month (not as if he hadn't already occupied them enough previously). Cloud felt his breath stolen away from him. As stunning as ever. His posture seemed at ease on the crowded stage, but that could be because all the other suited men standing there had seemed to give him his own berth, and that was deceptive as well.

Cloud knew he was never at ease, Sephiroth would never allow himself to be. The General's eyes were focused distractedly on the wood of the stage and Cloud felt it would burst into fire if he soon did not look away. Cloud wished he would look up, glance at him even, he needed to see that reluctance to leave as he had in the training room just before he'd left so long ago. Needing confirmation of that double-edged blessing from even longer back. Needing freedom from his torture.

But the General kept his eyes stoically on the floor. Cloud cursed under his breath as the speeches came to an end. The hour had almost seemed to fly from him as he had gazed at the silver-haired angel, and not once had moved from his position. Cloud prayed as the other men were dismissed he would look up, but he was disappointed as he watched him leave through the small door the other men had filed into.

He was first to leave and Cloud was out almost right after him. It was a maze of corridors to try and find where he had gotten out, but eventually he came across the door and took off in the only direction it followed. He came to the elevators to the upper floors and shouted out a sailor-worthy swear. He pounded his defeated fists on the metal of the elevator, but it did not give in to his demands.

Finally, feeling worse then before, Cloud turned and tried to remember where the nearest bathroom was. He needed to sit and think everything through for a moment before he could face anyone. The General had seemed different; reserved, colder somehow. What had happened to him? What was he holding back?

Cloud bit his lip as he mulled his questions over and turned down a deserted hallway with a small one-stalled bathroom at the end. He stopped just before the door, staring at, a very small, lost look on his face. '_How is love the greatest thing in the world if all it does is destroy me_?' Cloud thought, anger rising. The sound of the bathroom door being thrown open caused Cloud to jump and cry out.

Then, large arms were wrapping around his small figure and then he was pulled against an unmistakably male chest. He smelled leather and that scent he had always had flitting in the back of his mind since "that night" and his heart stopped.

"G-G-General?" he stuttered, not able to believe it. There was no answer, but the man grabbed him around the shoulders and slammed him into the door, which was now closed, and rough lips descended onto his timid ones' fiercely. Cloud melted. It _was_ him.

How had he known he would be back here? Wait, if he was kissing him now, did that mean it had happened before? Had it been real? He dared not hope, but instead took advantage of the opportunity and kissed him back, letting all his pent up frustration out in his kiss. There was a rumble from the older man's lips and he used his smooth tongue to force open Cloud's lips.

……………………..

(Slight flashback to the meeting)

(Seph's POV BTW…)

Sephiroth watched Cloud watching him. The boy was stubborn and kept his beautiful eyes on him the entire time. He made sure not to look at him, even though he felt every atom in his body was pulling towards him.

He knew if he looked up he would see desperate hope and that same look he always saw in his _uke_'s (AN: Sorry to interrupt, but well, I need to point out that the reason Japanese words do not translate well to English is because they CANNOT BE MADE PLURAL OR POSSESSIVE WITH AN "S", SUCH AS SAMURAIS, KATANAS, ETC. So everyone knows I did this in blatant disregard to my own rules that I strictly follow. So please don't yell at me for the grammatical mistake, I'm well aware I've done it, but my proper English OCD is worse then my proper Japanese OCD. That is all, sorry, just had to get that out there ;) ) eyes. He knew it would be there along with burning lust that he would _not_ be able to resist.

He needed to get the _uke_ alone. He _wanted_ him alone. It had been too long without his addiction, his honey as his mind had taken to calling him. Images of "that night" played through his mind making a rather effectively distracting diversion from what was going on around him. He tried to hide a smile as he noticed several of the other officers and Shin-Ra workers around him looking rather uncomfortable with his presense. Good. He liked to watch them squirm.

And still he felt the _uke_ with his eyes on him. He hoped he didn't loose his control or sanity before the ending of this wretched ceremony. When the closing statement was made, Sephiroth was the first to leave, knowing with a certainty, that his _uke_ would follow him, and he did.

He moved slowly, deciding to duck into a side corridor near the elevators that led only to a bathroom at the end as he waited. He watched as only a few moments later a flash of blonde and long limbs went running by and then stopped at the elevators, slamming his fists into the doors. Sephiroth watched him as he crumpled in on himself and was tempted to wrap him in his arms and comfort him.

The heart-broken look on his face made his own chest pain him. The boy straightened slightly and murmured to himself, probably barely aware of it, "Bathroom", and Sephiroth whipped around and headed for the bathroom. He closed the door quietly behind him, using his impossibly acute hearing to pick up his footsteps as he made his way down the corridor and closer to him. How would he react when he saw Sephiroth hiding, waiting for him in the bathroom? Would he frighten him? He cursed inwardly at his stupidity. Then the footsteps stopped, and stayed frozen, just in the doorway.

Sephiroth tensed, but the _uke_ never came in. finally, unable to bear waiting with the object of his desire just beyond a thick metal door, Sephiroth threw it open and found a very pathetic and miserable looking Cloud. He felt his heart breaking for the boy and did the first thing that came to his mind; he embraced him, liking how nicely they seemed to fit together. "G-G-General?" Cloud managed over Sephiroth's chest and then Sephiroth snapped and he pushed the boy into the door pressing their lips together.

It was awkward for a moment and then he loosened up and kissed Sephiroth back with as much ferocity and pent up desire that it nearly drove the General insane again. He forced his tongue into the wonderfully soft mouth, and finally tasted what he had missed so dearly. His hands did not stay dormant either. They traveled all over Cloud's body, and Cloud merely clung to him, seemingly unable to do anything else.

Then the boy timidly, just as last time, slipped his tongue back into Sephiroth's mouth. Attempting to encourage him, Sephiroth nipped his tongue gently. Cloud jumped slightly, then went almost limp again as he stroked Sephiroth's tongue. Sephiroth grabbed his hands at the wrists and placed them against the wall over his head.

Cloud squirmed a bit and for a moment Sephiroth broke the kiss and looked down on him. Seeing his bruised lips and reddened face as the younger man gazed up at him through hooded eyes, Sephiroth felt an overwhelming feeling of possession. He wanted to mark him; make him his. The sudden thought of Cloud being in this same slightly imprisoned condition with anyone else, ever, made Sephiroth growl.

Cloud seemed taken-aback at Sephiroth's sudden withdrawal, but Sephiroth dove back in for another round of tonsil hockey and pushed his body hard into Cloud's, letting him feel how much he had missed his company. Cloud responded wonderfully by struggling against Sephiroth's iron grip in a way that was more seducing then anything else.

Sephiroth pulled away again, this time for air and nibbled on Cloud's jawline. "Honey, honey, honey…" his voice was a low rumble and for some reason this made Cloud shiver. "Sephiroth, let me go." Hearing his name on those sweet lips had him disarmed for a moment, and Cloud broke out of his grip, moving his hands down to his chest and then his pants. The General gave him a lusty smile. "Good choice of direction." he whispered and Cloud blushed.

This warmed Sephiroth, to see that he was still slightly naïve and he slipped his hands down Cloud's back, trailing kisses down his neck, but leaving no marks. He wanted to badly, so desperately, mark what he knew was his, but resisted. Cloud's hands dipped to his button, and tracing it with a long finger before opening it he dipped his hands inside to rest on the General's bare hips.

The older man gasped and pushed himself harder into Cloud who merely smiled in a devilish manner and trailed his finger on the oh-so-sensitive skin just below his naval before he found himself being lifted by his arse by Sephiroth. The older man eyed his pants wearily before hissing: "These are in the way." And literally ripping them off. Cloud was embarrassed for his sudden nakedness, especially while fully aroused, but Sephiroth only gazed at him then into his eyes. "You're so beautiful…" the words were so genuine, that Cloud flushed again and settled into the fact that his legs hung off of the floor.

Then he saw Sephiroth drop his own pants and prepared himself for what he knew was coming. And when Sephiroth dove inside of him he cried out, louder then he had his first time, and writhed like mad. He wrapped long, slightly pale legs around Sephiroth's waist and was then able to take him in fully.

It took less time to stop hurting this time. It turned to rocketing pleasure almost instantly. Soon he was moaning and rocking with Sephiroth's thrusts and letting him attack his mouth brutally as he had last time. It was as perfect as he remembered. And as he exploded into thousands of stars and fell against Sephiroth calling out his name, he felt the other man shuddering and doing the same. His name sounded wonderful on those thin, yet strong, lips.

They crumpled into each other, each panting and exhausted. As Sephiroth came back to himself, he realised he was still deep inside the boy and became more aware that, even though obviously fatigued, his legs still clutched tightly to him and he still seemed un-fazed by this. His back was slammed into the wall and his weight was supported only by Sephiroth's large hands (AN: ;) ) and his intricately long legs. Which were as desirable as he'd imagined.

Before quenching his first thirst for the boy he had often had restless nights of thinking of being between those two long legs, embraced by them in the most passionate embrace two human beings could share. He didn't want to, for the _uke_ felt far too nice around him to pull out of, but Sephiroth gently and consciously lowered the still-gasping younger man onto his lap and gently eased him off of his shaft.

He sighed when the blonde _uke_ curled into his chest, pulling his legs up to his chest and burying his face in Sephiroth's collar bone. He gave him a few butterfly kisses there before he rested against him. Soon his breathing slowed and he raised dreary eyes to Sephiroth's deep, melted orbs.

"I love you."

Sephiroth worked very hard to school his expression. He stroked his soft hair and was relieved when he realised Cloud had expected no response. The boy yawned, stretched slightly and proceeded to fall asleep as Sephiroth continued stroking his hair, deep in thought.

…………..

(Still Seph's POV)

He supposed that having the love of the beautiful ray of sunshine that was Cloud Strife would bring more trouble then peace. But he also knew, somewhere inside him, the confession had awoken a heart Sephiroth had long ago abandoned in favour of cold apathy, in light of his life and situation.

But for the first time, he considered leaving Shin-Ra. Of seeking a life outside of these concrete walls, outside of _Midgar_ dare he even say, for him and his sunshine, his _uke_, his honey. They had rough waters ahead of them, but right now Sephiroth's most pressing issue was how to get the sleeping bundle that was Cloud back to his rooms.

'_You would change me into all I fear honey _uke…'

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AN: Wow. Hey. I never expected to get this far this fast…prolly cuz all my other fics I gotta go with plot building, etc., whereas here I'm runnin' on pure hormones and, of course, the song this "chapter" (still uncertain of what this is, either random smatherings, or some kind of dragged out one-shot, or even, now a story with different parts…O.o) is named after, inspired by, written to, you-would-not-have-it-without-it, Honey by L'ArcenCiel (and Enrai by Do As Infinity….it's so pretty, look it up). Dunno why, because it doesn't really match, but it just…._fit_.

So yes, even though Sephie-sama refers to Cloud-o-kun (as Zack so aptly invented…--;) as his "honey" it's really after the song. DOWNLOAD IT AND LISTEN TO IT AS YOU READ! I swear my writing seems to take on different shape. Plus it seems to set the mood for a lemon. And if you have the song or CD, SEND IT TO ME, PLEASE, I CAN'T FIND THE BLASTED CD ANYWHERE…..! Okay. Every review I got begged for more ("begged" is a bit dramatic, as you can see, Kurai-Tenshi is getting full of herself…) so here it is. And there could be more after this. If you want it that is. So…do you want it? (Tee-hee…I'm sooo dirty…) Okay, leave me a kind review, please, no flames, and umm…download the songs. _Sugoi_-_ni_. Kind criticism is accepted!

Have a _gomi_ day,

-Kurai-Tenshi of Doom ;;

"_I want to fly…waiting for sunrise…_"

(PS: Hyde is orgasmic, sorry; I just HAD to say that because of how true it is…)


	3. Pt 3 Snow Drop

Marks

Part Three

Snow Drop

AN: Welcome back everyone! Another round of this deceiving one-shot! I had no plot planned, which is why this took a bit longer, but now I think I know where I'm going with it, so here it is. But there's still lots of wild sex, don't worry. Oh and as a warning: Once again, horrible, evil things are occurring in my fanfiction, we are calling Saetan back to us because we miss him in our poker games. Yaoi mean boys sex, eat it if you don't like it (pun intended).

Oh yeah, they're not mine. Just on loan…grins evilly and grabs chains and whip

Enjoy everyone and please don't flame me, but I'd like everyone to know reviewing me so much and en masse as you have makes me cry in happiness and give meaning back to my existence. So thank you all!

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This time when Cloud woke up he knew it wasn't a dream. One of the leading reasons behind his new assumption was partly due to the fact that he was not in his own bed, the second the sleeping form beside him.

The General lay in wonderful, angelic, peaceful bliss beside him, appearing dead-to-the-world. Cloud almost gasped when he rolled over and caught sight of the long silver hair fanned around the older man's face. He allowed himself a few minutes to gaze at him then he came back to himself and assessed the situation.

He was naked. He made a small modest "eep-ing" noise and sat up, attempting not to wake the blissful Sephiroth. Unlucky as he seemed to always be, his silver angel's eyes slid open and he was instantly alert. It was as if he had never been asleep. As his slightly hazy eyes focused on Cloud his face was for the first time completely open to him and Cloud saw an odd kind of warmth radiating in the already-glowing Mako-infested orbs.

The room was lighted by a small light attached to a far wall, so most of the room lay in shadows and Cloud had a harder time of seeing him then the General did him. "General." Cloud acknowledged. His voice was raspy and he cleared it softly once he heard it. This made him grimace. His throat was too raw.

As soon as he spoke Sephiroth seemed to awaken fully and his eyes widened a fraction and closed to him once again. His features became drawn and he looked almost surprised. The room suddenly felt colder. Cloud wouldn't lie; Sephiroth had been wonderful to sleep next to. All power and comfort at once. Cloud hadn't slept so soundly in a long time. "Did you sleep?" Sephiroth's voice was still deep and when laced with sleep it became like a rhythmic hum. Cloud could get used to waking up to that every morning.

"_Hai_." He nodded. Cloud turned slightly red to see Sephiroth was naked as well. Then the bathroom came back to him…And with it a jarring pain in his back and the assorted bruises from the uncomfortable positions. It seemed the trysts with the General were never in a real bed, but always a rather unconventional spot. He grimaced again and the General caught it. As if reading his mind, his eyes twinkled oddly and he rumbled almost lazily: "It seems we keep meeting in the oddest places." Cloud smiled shyly at this.

Why he still felt so at odds with the beautiful creature that was Sephiroth was uncertain to him. After all the man had seen and touched his most intimate places, twice now, ravished his body twice, and seen him naked, hell, even given him a shower. And still he was modest and shy. He wanted to stop being so timid.

He wanted to be in control; he wanted to show the General how much he loved him and desired him; how far he would go for him. The General threw back the covers suddenly and stood and Cloud completely lost his train of thought (AN: Wouldn't you? Drools…). He had always wanted the opportunity to actually see the General nude. And now that the occasion arose his mouth dropped open and began to water. He shut it quickly for fear of embarrassing himself.

Sinewy, rippling muscles met and branched down his whole tall, lean body. He looked like a sculpted Adonis. Long legs, large shoulders, broad, androgynous waist, both effeminate and strangely male. His skin was pale, but not in an unhealthy way, almost like porcelain. Cloud imagined he wouldn't like the sun much. And then the thought of Sephiroth lazing on a beach came to him, skin hot and moist…he inhaled sharply and tried to get control of himself, but with Sephiroth's finely sculpted buttocks staring at him, it was hard (AN: No pun intended…).

He decided to close his eyes -even though the image was forever burned into his retinas- and took a few deep breaths. This worked, slightly, and when he re-opened them, Sephiroth had on his tight leather pants and nothing else. He turned to face Cloud and the youths' eyes traveled down the six-pack. He wanted to taste that fine skin, to make it red with passion. But Sephiroth seemed to be done with him at the moment.

Cloud knew his ideas and ambitions burned on his face as if he had a large neon sign glowing on his forehead stating: "I WANT YOU". Then his eyes caught Sephiroth's and he was cooled slightly by the glow of Mako and something else he had only ever seen in those glorious eyes; something thrilling, and dark and exciting. Something so uniquely…Sephiroth that he knew he would never find it again.

Again his brain screamed: 'What does he see in me?' but Cloud pushed this aside for a time when he wasn't in the presense of his object of torture. Sephiroth sitting on the edge of the bed broke their joined gaze and he kept his profile to Cloud. "You have an insatiable appetite, _uke_." Cloud took this as an invitation, and fingers crossed he leaned over and planted a lingering, longing kiss on the older man's neck.

The hiss alerted him he had been on the mark. Sephiroth had opened the door; he was giving him his chance, and Cloud would take it with vigor. For the first time _he_ was in control of the kiss. Every time their lips met, to Cloud, it felt like the first time all over again. He hoped it was as magical and enticing for the General. He prayed to the Planet and anything sacred he was good enough, desirable enough, attractive enough for such a complex and amazing man as Sephiroth.

Hoping to achieve better access to a mouth he'd fallen in love with almost as much as its owner, he slipped carefully and precariously onto Sephiroth's lap. He wanted to feel skin on skin, needed to feel it. He felt dwarfed by Sephiroth as he straddled him and leaned into his chest. Sephiroth moaned and Cloud treasured the noise; it meant he was doing something right.

He remembered the night in the showers, their first tryst, and made his decision. He wanted to hear more of those moans, to have Sephiroth as overcome with pleasure as he was when the General pushed inside of him; he wanted Sephiroth to know how much he was willing to give him.

The thought of reversing their positions occurred to him, but as his closed eyes opened slightly and he eyed the man euphoric below him he knew he couldn't ever tame the mighty Sephiroth in such a way. Well, not now at least. Sephiroth was a powerful creature, he was someone that needed to be in control, and Cloud recognised that and respected it. So he stuck to his original plan….

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(Seph's POV)

He thought he was in control. When Sephiroth felt unfamiliar movement on his bed he opened his eyes and in the haze of sleep noticed the striking blonde hair, soft body that he had memorised in his mind countless times, and the attractive face of Cloud Strife. He felt wonderfully at peace.

And then a word issued from those rosy lips that woke him immediately. He hated when he was called by his title. It had been arousing the first time around, but now he felt as if ravishing the boy twice was enough to merit a more informal title. But he seemed so hesitant to accept that Sephiroth wanted more then his body…wait? When had he made the decision he wanted anything more then sex, wonderful, amazing sex may he add, with the _uke_? It had been that kind of relationship from the start.

The stunning blonde's love confession struck him suddenly and he found he needed to distance himself before he took the boy again…and again. Him sitting there, eyes wide in innocence and deliciously naked was far too much for him to handle right now. He remembered his moans, the way he felt, how hot that skin could get, how elegant his body was, especially in the height of pleasure…he bared his teeth angrily at himself.

He was arousing himself so early? All because the boy was next to him, in his bed naked? He had resisted such temptations before. Why, now, did such a thing have such an effect on him? And why did he feel he wanted more then a physical relationship with him? Why was his heart getting involved in decisions?

The heart that had always existed only to pump blood, never act metaphorically….why now was it doing more then it was supposed to do?

Once his pants were on he turned back to the _uke_ resolutions in place; he would allow him to wash and dress and let him leave, since he knew that he would be wanting to leave now. He saw Cloud's lips first, and re-thought said resolutions. Then his eyes traveled slowly up to his flushed cheeks, and he remembered how the rest of his skin flushed as he writhed when Sephiroth was inside him, and he revised said resolutions. And then he saw the eyes that haunted his thoughts almost every night; the eyes that spoke of things Sephiroth barely understood, that held so much feeling and compassion for him, and trusted him unconditionally it seemed, that spoke of a kind of understanding of him as no others' ever had and then he recognised the lust that burned flamboyantly in them and he chucked his prick-ish resolutions out of the proverbial window.

He'd be dammed if he didn't take advantage of the _uke_ and his prominent want of him. He sat on the edge of the bed and gave him his invitation; if only he would take it. The sweet kiss on his neck spoke of secrets and promises and Sephiroth hissed in pleasure, wanting to know if he would fill those promises.

He did, and when their lips met, Sephiroth let him control it. it was hard to reign himself in and let the younger man take over, but once the slight hesitanse in him deserted itself he attacked Sephiroth's mouth viciously. It was enough to make him moan. He was surprised at the noise, having rarely heard it from his own lips, and he told himself control was essential, but then the little mischievous _uke_ slid onto his lap and Sephiroth saw and felt his arousal and the lithe body sliding onto his own highly-sensitive area made him almost see stars. How he could have such an effect on him, he had no idea.

But he decided to give in and let him have his way with him. After all, he had attacked the poor thing on two occasions already. _Uke _deserved a break. He broke the kiss from Sephiroth's mouth and moved to his neck. Sephiroth felt his breath catch. Those smooth lips felt so wonderful on his bare skin! Every one of his senses felt heightened, extra-sensitive.

Then he moved down, to his collarbone and nibbled affectionately, moving down still and stopping perched just above his rosy nipple. His hooded eyes gazed into Sephiroth's for a moment and he became aware that he was completely at the younger man's mercy. Somehow, this didn't bother him as much as he thought. In fact he pleaded with his eyes for him to carry on.

He wanted to feel those lips on him, all over him, even if he couldn't mark him. This unnerved him slightly, but he completely forgot when Cloud gently kissed him in the spot he had earlier teased. Then his tongue descended onto it and Sephiroth gasped. Then his mouth closed over it and he sucked hard. Sephiroth threw his head back and bit his lip hard. He thought he almost drew blood. But he couldn't care less. His head was spinning when the _uke_ released him and continued downwards to his naval.

He spent a bit of time tracing each corded muscle with his teeth, then tongue until finally he came to Sephiroth's pants. "To quote you," he whispered voice husky, "these are in the way." He grinned devilishly as Sephiroth's trembling hands fumbled to release them. He shook his head and grabbed his hands. His were so small and bird-like, but Sephiroth allowed his grip to keep.

He looked down at the once-_uke_ who was on his knees in-between his legs. His eyes still burned with lust and they were rather seducing in themselves as he gazed up at Sephiroth. The silver-haired man growled. The blonde nodded and lowered those flaming eyes.

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(Cloud's POV)

Cloud smiled to himself and eyed the one button on the General's pants. Perfect, easy access. His hands rested on Sephiroth's hips and he pushed the man down hard. The bulge straining against its bond seemed to strain more. Cloud could not wipe the smile off of his face. Sephiroth lay flat on his back on the bed and placed his piano hands on his flat stomach, seeming to accept his new fate.

Then his tongue traced the button. The heat of Sephiroth radiated through him. He loved it. His smell was wonderfully thick and Cloud treasured that he would smell like him for awhile. He used his teeth on the button. Then again on the zipper…slowly, so slowly until Sephiroth made an almost whimpering noise and strained against Cloud's hands.

Cloud applied more pressure, and when his member sprang free of its prison Cloud's eyes widened. It suddenly seemed so much bigger…would it even fit? He hoped he wouldn't choke. He re-gained his courage at another slight whimper from Sephiroth. His grin returned and his hands slid the pants sinuously down his long legs and then he let his nails skirt back up to his inner thighs. Sephiroth's legs clamped around Cloud's back pulling him in tight.

Cloud kissed his lower naval and then, taking a deep mental breath, the very tip of him. Sephiroth arched his back and moaned again. That was what egged Cloud on. His tongue slipped down it once, then up again. Sephiroth moaned again and again until Cloud heard him almost pleading, or as close as Sephiroth would ever come to pleading: "Cloud, please…" There was an earnest note in that voice, and a bit of impatience. That was what he'd wanted.

He knew Sephiroth felt how he did when he was touched by those graceful hands and stared at with obvious desire in the silver-haired man's eyes. He felt desperate and pleading. He enveloped him, only half-way, completely un-sure of his actions and guided only by instinct and remembrance of what Sephiroth had done so wonderfully the first time.

Sephiroth went rigid, then moaned deeply. Cloud loved every minute of it. He began repeating what he remembered, which was almost everything, and eventually took all of him into his mouth. He almost choked, as he'd thought, but shifted a bit and managed not to. It all happened so fast after that. Suddenly Sephiroth had cried out his name and Cloud found he had exploded into his mouth.

Without realising it, he swallowed it and noticed it wasn't as bad as he had thought. In fact, the taste was extremely unique and he knew he associated it with Sephiroth himself. He pushed off of him and found he was still locked in a panting Sephiroth's legs.

He turned himself around so his back leaned into him and placed his head against his inner thigh. When the older man had re-gained control of himself he placed both his hands on either side of Cloud's face. His thumb stroked his cheek, almost in a loving manner, and he sat up and bent over him. He whispered into his hair:

"I hope you're not too tired _uke_, I'm not quite done with you yet."

Cloud's eyes widened slightly, suddenly losing all his earlier zeal and courage. Although still completely aroused himself, and having found no release, he knew that Sephiroth taking him would be the only thing to relieve him. But was the older man up to it? His question was answered when Sephiroth's legs released him and he told him to stand.

Cloud, utterly confused, but easily manipulated, stood and looked down on a sitting Sephiroth. The man's eyes trailed down Cloud's body, stopping to eye his erection. He looked up to an embarrassed Cloud and let his hand slide down his cheek affectionately again. "Just being near you makes me want you, Cloud, don't ever worry about that." And his hands grabbed his waist roughly and spun him around so his back faced him and he pulled him onto his legs. Cloud gasped.

He was already coming back to life and when Cloud wiggled a bit in his hands his hiss indicated he was back to where he had been just a few moments ago. He then literally picked Cloud up by his waist and brought him down onto him. Cloud screamed slightly and a tear escaped through his closed eyes. He was still tender and such a harsh jarring had hurt him and stung, but it took only a few moments and then the pain disappeared and slow rippling pleasure replaced it.

A thrust and then another and soon his head was thrown back against Sephiroth's chest and his legs were wrapped around the older man's. It took almost no time for him to reach his peak and when he did he exploded into space and the heavens greeted him gladly. When he spiraled back to the Planet he found he was curled in Sephiroth's arms and lying on the bed. The older man was breathing deeply.

They revelled in the others' comfort and presense for awhile until Sephiroth's cultured voice rumbled: "Shall we take a shower, _uke_?" his arms tightened around him for a moment before he nodded. He was exhausted, but a shower sounded really nice. Sephiroth carried him to his private furnished bathroom and turned on the water. He sat Cloud on the toilet and turned on the large cubicle-shower. He opened the door all the way and beckoned to him.

Cloud groggily stood and made his way into the shower, letting the spray relax him. Sephiroth slipped in after him and closed the door. Cloud hoped he wouldn't repeat their first night, but he didn't, he only washed him as he had before, but this time no seduction was involved. It was slow and ever-so-gentle, and caring almost. By the time Sephiroth had finished with him and then quickly scrubbed himself, Cloud felt ready for a meal then a good nap.

Sephiroth lent him an old uniform and he slipped into the clean material, treasuring the warm cotton in the slightly drafty room. Sephiroth led him like a helpless child to the private kitchen hidden around a corner from the central room, which happened to house his bed, and to a small card-table set up with two obviously neglected chairs.

He sat him down and somehow produced bread and some kind of meat. Cloud didn't notice; his eyes were dragging. He ate it and downed the wine he was offered, noting the slight bitter taste to it, before Sephiroth swept him into his arms and carried him to the bed.

Sometime while Cloud had been eating he had replaced the sheets with crisp new white ones' and now placed Cloud in them. He slipped onto his opposite side and wrapped his arm around his waist. Cloud turned over and curled into him.

This was perhaps the most tender moment in his whole life. It was better then sex, he'd say that much. Well, maybe not better, but definitely more affectionate. Loving, almost. He might have whispered as much just before dropping off, and he would later not believe he had only because of the imagined answer he thought he had received from Sephiroth:

"I know."

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(Still Cloud's POV)

(Warning, some boring plot building, and some sweet stuff, no more lemons sorry…)

When Cloud woke up he tried to tell himself it had all been a dream. Sleeping with the General, his love, and falling asleep lovingly in his arms in his bed. But when his eyes opened he was met with the General's room and Sephiroth himself looming over him.

He made his "eep-ing" noise (AN: Kurai does this when she is scared…) and sat up fast. "Are you awake?" The loving, caring Sephiroth seemed to be gone, replaced with the General. "Yes, I think so." Cloud grasped his chest, hoping this would slow his thumping heart. It did a little, but Sephiroth's presense only sped it up a bit.

"I've been assigned a mission again. I'll be away for a while." Cloud felt his heart falling into a bottomless pit. "Oh." Was all he could muster. "You've been allowed to attend with Zack and I if you'd like." "Yes!" It was out before he'd truly registered what Sephiroth had said.

The rise in his eyebrows told Cloud Sephiroth was a bit surprised by his quick decision. "Where is it to?" he asked next, suddenly eager. "A town called Nibelheim." Cloud's heart sky-dived again. His hometown. As he looked into Sephiroth's eyes he was struck with a horrible sense of auguristic doom. It was sudden, but lingering and it made him nauseous.

"I don't think you should go." He whispered eyes wide and un-seeing. Sephiroth's brow creased. "Why?" he asked, obviously curious. "I have a horrible, horrible feeling…" Cloud felt dumb after he'd said it, it sounded so…cheesy, but it was the truth. Every one of his particles screamed for him and Sephiroth not to go. He had no explanation for it, so he pushed it aside.

"Are you sure you don't want to go? I can cancel it for another time…" Sephiroth trailed off and Cloud looked up to him again. He met the sparkling galactic eyes and felt touched Sephiroth would sacrifice something for him. "No, it's fine, I'm just being dumb. Sometimes I get odd feelings like that, especially as of late, being around you…" he looked away, afraid he had said something offending.

Sephiroth patted him gently on the head, and then cupped his cheek again. He tilted his face up to meet his eyes again and Cloud saw a slight smile in them. "Did you know you taste deliciously like honey?" he asked before he dropped Cloud's now-red cheek and turned away from him. "You're lucky you had yesterday off from your lessons, and today Zack is covering for you. But this is the only free chance. If you're coming to Nibelheim with us you'll need to be ready by the end of the week. You'll be a simple SOLDIER guard, but at least you'll be…there."

Cloud noticed his pause and wondered what he had meant to say. "_With me_" perhaps? He dared not hope. "I can do that…" he trailed off and he knew Sephiroth heard what he had meant to say hanging in the air: "_for you…_".

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(A week later)

(Sorry for the cheesy time jump…--;)

(Still Cloud's POV)

Cloud sighed, now almost completely bored. He was tired, uncomfortable and hungry. The SOLDIER uniform barely stayed on his lanky form. It was at least two sizes too big on the top and uncomfortably tight on the bottom. On his left, with a large amount of space between them, sat Sephiroth in all his cold-General glory, and across from him a hyper, rambunctious Zack who refused to sit still.

Zack talked the whole time and Sephiroth remained gradually quiet, barely answering any of Zack's pestering questions. This barely fazed Zack and he continued with some odd story or another. The General had completely ignored Cloud when they had gotten onto the bus and treated him with a passing acknowledgement of his existence, and only because he was on the mission, but every once in awhile, Cloud would swear he would catch Sephiroth's eyes focused on him, observing and taking him in as he did when they were alone.

It made him smile behind his shield and feel gradually better about this whole trip. The whole thing had felt bad to him from the first time it was mentioned and his feeling only worsened as they arrived closer to his home….He eyed Sephiroth with worried eyes. The man seemed unaware.

What was to come of this, and why did he feel it was so wrong?

TBC!

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AN: Whew. Sorry bout the wait, but I gave you an extra-juicy lemon in returnD And all my little random AN's in the middle, sorry, I just had to add my own little comments, hope I didn't ruin the moment…

Anyways, now that I have a semi-plot I hope this ends okay, and not awkwardly. But will it be a happy ending or not? Why does Cloud-kun feel like Sephie-sama is in danger? Why does it all feel _wrong_ to him? Why doesn't Zack ever shut up? And, more importantly, will Sephie-sama ever get Cloud-kun back for torturing him in the sack? We can only hope so, devious little Sephie-sama….;)

Sorry again for the wait, to everyone who reviews…I give you my pitiful soul, you keep me going.

Love,

-Kurai-Tenshi of Doom

(Oh, and as a side-note I've decided to name the followed chapters after L'Arc-en-Ciel (AKA Laruku)songs, this one is super, Snow Drop, download it or something!)


	4. Pt 4 AS IF IN A DREAM

Marks 

Part Four:

AS IF IN A DREAM

AN: Woo-hoo! Hey there everybody! Here I am again, posting more pornographic-resembling fan fiction that I am so wonderfully proud of. Now that we've had three (and now in this one four) parts of steamy lemons, it's time for some plot building. After another lemon. So beware, there's actually a point to this chapter besides hot sex.(Shocking, I know, bet you didn't think little Kurai-chan thought of anything else, nya?) Anyways, buckle down and enjoy the ride. Oh, and as a side-note…

Disclaimer: Will thumb-wrestle for ownership of Sephiroth's body…and the rest of him, I guess…

And in case my introduction wasn't enough, there will be hot, steamy, grimy guy-on-guy sex. Enjoy!

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(Cloud's POV)

"Cloudie-kun, how do we always end up together? It must be fate." Zack sighed romantically and cast an exhausted Cloud his best fluttering-eyed look. Cloud, completely used to his antics, ignored him, mouth tight.

He continued unpacking, and Zack frowned as he watched his stiff movements. He threw himself onto Cloud's small four-poster bed suddenly and grinned saucily up at him. "Make love to me, now." Cloud sighed and gave him an exasperated look. "I have a headache." Zack groaned and sat up giving his friend puppy-dog eyes. "You lead me on always you saucy minx. Give in to desire." "Zack, not right now okay?"

Zack, having known shy little Cloud since his arrival at ShinRa automatically sensed his friend was disturbed. His simple retort spoke volumes only Zack knew how to listen for. And this was after almost six years in his friends' presense. "What did he do? Should I go beat his tight ass into oblivion?" Cloud finally smiled a bit at this, and Zack pressed on.

"Cloud, you can talk to me, or you can be quiet, but I assure you, I know Seph almost as well as I know you." Cloud met Zack's eyes and the grave seriousness he saw there made him swallow thickly. "How do you know the problem's him?" he asked voice hoarse. Zack sighed, shaking his head, spikes jiggling slightly. "How do I know as soon as I leave you alone you're going to start crying and how do I know whatever he's doing to be more of an ass then he already is, you're blaming yourself for?"

Cloud sat down heavily next to Zack on his bed, although given his small weight this made almost no impression on the crisp comforter. He bent over himself and placed his head in his hands. "We're…well, we've been-" Cloud stumbled to find the words, his voice slightly muffled between his hands. Zack leaned closer to hear him better and realised he was blushing.

"Intimate." He supplied. His friend cast relieved eyes up to him and nodded. Zack grinned slightly at his younger friends' innocence. It was attractive in its own way and he supposed it was something the General valued in the boy. Cloud seemed like he needed someone to protect him; he always appeared so fragile.

"Yes, and I thought maybe I meant something to him, I thought I had begun to break through that wall of ice he put up around himself, I've told him that I…" He trailed off again and Zack rolled his eyes and supplied for him again: "Love him." Cloud went slightly rigid at the word "love" and he refused to look at Zack as he sat straight.

"Planet Cloud, like it hasn't been obvious from the first moment you saw him. You're rather easy to read, especially when you're in love." Cloud flushed and fidgeted with his hands in his lap. He kept his eyes on his legs, refusing to look at Zack.

"Yes, well, I've told him, and I never expected anything back, I never expected him to love me back, I'm amazed he feels an attraction to me in the first place…but when we're…well, you know, I feel like he's so gentle and caring, but as soon as it's well…over…he goes back to the way he was. I mean…I should just be happy he's even interested in my body, and it's not that I'm not grateful, believe me I bless every day and night for it, but sometimes I wish he liked the rest of me too."

Zack took a deep breath. '_I bet Seph has no idea how much he affects the poor kid…_' He thought. He took a deep breath and placed a careful arm on Cloud's hunched shoulders, so much smaller then his own. He would admit, the boy's body structure was not built for SOLDIER, but his pure will and determination easily made up for it. "Cloud, Seph's not like most people, he doesn't understand how to show affection."

Cloud's wide eyes flew to his and he protested: "No! Believe me I understand that, I understand the way he acts and I respect it, but…it still makes me wonder if he really does feel any kind of affection for me, something besides lust. I just…love him so much I have no idea what I would do if he suddenly got bored of me or if I wasn't good enough for him. Right now I'm so happy just to be near him, to touch him, to have him touch me, but when he tires of me, I'd die if he stopped and ignored me. But I know it's completely foolish for me to think he would feel anything other then lust for me…I even have a hard time believing he feels that for me-" "Cloud, shut up! I can't stand this moping and being so down on yourself." Zack interrupted, eyes flashing in his anger at his friend's defeatist attitude. He continued:

"You never notice how people look at you, do you? I don't know how you can miss it! Cloud, you are so beautiful, and so amazingly desirable it's confounding Seph isn't here right now shagging you. I'm surprised he can walk away from you." Cloud's eyes stayed their wide innocent gaze and Zack sighed and shook his head again, fed up with that gaze for once.

"I know you'll never believe me, but Sephiroth has more then enough reason to want you, and even more to fall in love with you. You know him on some level no-one else can reach, you can see the good in him, and you don't fear him. He's just a prick and an idiot and he has no idea how perfect you are, and how perfect for him you are. He's a big stupid idiot, and you're too meek to do anything about it. Grow some self-confidence boy, you have enough in you that other people envy, and you're just as dumb as Seph for not seeing it. The two of you…" he flicked Cloud on the nose and the blonde grabbed it and glared at him. He smiled warmly at his younger friend.

"He loves you Cloud. Believe me, he's so in love with you he doesn't even know it." Cloud lowered his eyes again, this time shy. Zack grinned and pulled him into his side. Cloud enjoyed the comfort his friend always brought. Maybe he was right…maybe the General did have some kind of affection for him. But how did he make the gruff man realise it? He frowned.

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(Cloud's POV still)

Cloud walked out of the Inn and breathed deeply. He knew this air well, and resented it. He had not wanted to come back until he was a successful SOLDIER, not a lowly Cadet. The only thing he liked about coming back here was the sky. Midgar had nothing like it.

His head craned upwards and he took in the dark sky above him. It was like fabric with jewels sewn in in strategic places; stars glimmered brilliantly and it almost took his breath away. He sat on the edge of the fountain in the centre of town and soaked in the silence and fresh air. It smelled of freedom, and yet his foreboding was still strong.

He puzzled over the odd feeling as his spikes fell back from his face. His head was craned directly upwards as he lost himself in thought and he ignored the slight discomfort this brought. The rustling of leather made him jerk and look to his left.

The General stood there; Cloud hadn't heard him approaching. When he saw the look in the older man's eyes he shivered and was almost afraid. A sort of wildness was in his gaze and he was focused on Cloud so intensely as if he were in doubt he was real. Dim light from the Inn lit the General's face almost ominously and Cloud wondered why he was looking at him like that; something about him felt different.

He said nothing, only stared at Cloud. Cloud spoke, hesitantly. "General, good evening." He nodded his head in recognition. It hurt his chest to speak so formally to him, his heart felt as if it were being speared on a stake. And yet he made it beat ever so fast with those beautiful eyes.

"Cloud…"

The silver-haired man trailed off, seeming unable to speak. Cloud kept his gaze, almost afraid to break it. "Beautiful sky out to-" Cloud's pitiful attempt at breaking the pregnant silence was cut off as Sephiroth lunged for him. He pulled the shocked blonde to his feet and held him tightly. "S-Sephiroth!" Cloud gasped out, trying to take hold of his trembling limbs and pounding heart.

The closeness of Sephiroth had him aroused already and he cursed himself. Sephiroth clung to him as he thought he was going to disappear. "What's wrong?" Cloud asked, clearing his throat. The older man seemed scared almost. "You…You're so beautiful…" Sephiroth's normally intimidating voice was soft and like a slight breeze on Cloud's neck. He flushed and went rigid in his arms. He was speechless, lost in the pure feeling and emotion in Sephiroth's voice.

He finally pulled back and looked into Cloud's eyes. A small smile touched his enticing lips and Cloud found his eyes attached to them. The smile was extraordinary and seemed to make him somehow less imposing and awkward; his face finally looked his age. He seemed less all-powerful and somehow human. But Cloud had always known there was this side to him; he had seen the human in him long ago not needing the slightly rusty smile to see it.

"It's just…under the stars, you were so ethereal, and I thought you were some kind of angel. You seemed to at peace I was afraid…" he trailed off and looked away seeming ashamed. Taking a deep breath for courage, Cloud took his chin and ever-so-gently turned his eyes back to his own. Sephiroth met his eyes, and Cloud felt he had just taken a step through the door to winning and earning Sephiroth's trust. He had taken the first step towards saving him.

The silver-haired man continued: "I thought you would return to the heavens' and leave me." Cloud smiled slightly at the slight redness he caught in the General's fine cheekbones. He stood on the balls of his feet and placed a small, sweet kiss on his lips. The older man seemed to absorb the kiss; as if it were healing him. "I wouldn't go back without you." Cloud whispered against his lips.

…………….

(AN: Haha, you wanted me to mention you? Well, it was here where I was stuck when you called me Good convo BTW.)

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(Cloud-kun POV)

They had been meeting in the centre at the fountain every midnight for the past two days. They had done nothing physical other then a rather intensive kiss before they retired for the night, but Cloud had sensed the tension building up slowly and steadily. And yet they had sufficed from just enjoying the company of the other.

They spoke every once in awhile, but most of the time they gazed at the stars, Cloud tucked comfortably into Sephiroth's lap. This position had been discovered after Cloud's small kiss on the first night. Sephiroth had proceeded to sweep him into his arms and place across his lap wedding-style tucking his head into his neck. It had flustered Cloud for a bit, until he realised the brusque blatant gesture was a way the General was showing he trusted Cloud. It was a way he showed that sex was not the only thing he connected Cloud with. At least that's the way it _seemed_.

But still, sex was something Cloud and Sephiroth never kept far from mind. Their desire and base attraction was never far from mind, even though they were able to contain themselves enough in order to enjoy each others' company. And tonight, Cloud only hoped he could contain himself. If the General placed him in his lap (he always started out their meetings in the same way by dragging him onto his lap) again he might loose control.

The first reaction Cloud had when near Sephiroth was lust, but after adjusting onto him he found he felt quite at home. And yet tonight felt different as soon as he stepped back under the cloudy skies; it felt as if their quiet bonding had ended. As Cloud passed the dark alley between the Inn and its neighbouring buildings he sensed the General had come to same conclusion.

Which is why the General's attack on him wasn't more then a bit expected. Cloud found himself suddenly being dragged by the arm roughly into the alley and thrown against the brick. Sephiroth pinned him with the full length of his powerful body against the wall.

Cloud took note of how he treated him roughly and yet handled him as if he were made of glass. That hand that had pulled him into the alley was soft and barely exerted any pressure and his body pinning him to the wall pushed him in more of a comforting way, with a very sharp reminder of who he was and just how very seductive he was as well.

Cloud bit his lip and looked into eyes he had long ago fallen in love with. His eyes widened in surprise. Those were not the eyes of the Sephiroth he knew and loved. These eyes were sharp and cunning, with something Cloud couldn't decipher on the edge of them. But above all else there was an obvious burning need. Cloud inhaled Sephiroth's strong smell, oddly of sandalwood and grass and the wonderful biting wind. But still, Cloud sensed something was different, off, about his _seme_. Again the feeling of foreboding and general wrongness came to him.

He turned his head away from those burning eyes brimming with need and lust. "Something's wrong." He voiced. There was a rumble above him from Sephiroth and Cloud's eyes looked back to him. He had growled at him! Now he looked positively feral. (AN: Sephiroth want sex, NOW! Sorry, had to add that…lol)

When his lips descended on Cloud's they were rough, and his tongue pushed forcefully into his mouth and enforced Cloud into complianse. Sephiroth was practically devouring him. For the first time Cloud felt a new feeling of raw, forceful desire in him. He wanted Sephiroth to take him right against the wall, and he wanted him to be rough.

Sephiroth seemed to pick up on his thoughts and he quickly worked on Cloud's bottoms. Soon they pooled around his legs, and when Cloud's clumsy fingers went to work on Sephiroth's he bit the man's tongue harshly. Sephiroth hissed and then bit on his lips, small nips of enjoyment that egged Cloud on as Sephiroth lifted him up and he wrapped his legs around him, leaving just enough slack for Sephiroth to support him and for his member to hover just by his entrance as he was freed from his imprisonment that pants so often provided.

Cloud sensed the silver-haired man's hesitanse and he opened molten eyes to look up at him through long, sooty lashes. This seemed to make Sephiroth's mind up and he shoved inside Cloud full-force. Again, Cloud found he was still somewhat tender, and he cried out, but it was muffled by Sephiroth's nipping teeth and hungry lips.

He pulled out then thrust in again, burying himself fully. Cloud became aware that they had never been this forcefully joined, or this heated. It hurt more then anything and Cloud almost felt as if Sephiroth must be so far in almost to his spine. This would _kill_ tomorrow.

Cloud barely had time to adjust himself before Sephiroth pounded into him again and again until he moaned and quivered before leaning in against Cloud, spilling himself inside of him. Still supporting Cloud by the bottom, Cloud's legs wrapped around him, he panted and pulled out of him. Cloud grimaced. He would have protested if he had not caught sight of Sephiroth's eyes as he looked down to him.

The odd glimmer in them was gone; the need vanished with his taking of Cloud, now they were like they always were, deep and mysterious. And yet Cloud saw so much more in them then any other mortal ever had. He had needed Cloud, _used_ Cloud to find release. He wasn't sure if he should be offended or relieved. He decided on relieved.

The fact that Sephiroth came to him when he was in need was enough to make Cloud dance on air. He had almost forgotten he was completely aroused without release until Sephiroth's deceivingly-delicate hands slipped slowly down his shaft and around him, grasping and squeezing. It took just a few strokes for Cloud to come, and when he did he rode the waves of pleasure until they retreated.

When his eyes opened he was in Sephiroth's lap again, this time curled around him as he had been in their past trysts. Sephiroth was making small circles on his back. Cloud nuzzled into him a bit then inhaled deeply, loving his scent. "Feel better?" he asked, his voice a rasp. He felt his _seme_ go rigid and his circular motions stopped.

"Cloud, I'm so sorry…" he whispered, sounding almost lost. Clouds smiled to himself, the raw emotion and regret in Sephiroth's small whisper enough to dissipate any doubts of what else the rough lovemaking could mean. He kissed his neck gently. Sephiroth's nails dug into his back and Cloud's back arched, not liking the pain.

"Seph, that hurts." Instantly the offending nails were gone and the circular motions were back. "It's just, I feel like there's some odd force in my mind, this invisible presense that won't go away no matter how hard I try to ignore it, and I just needed a release, and being with you makes me so relaxed and calm…" he trailed off and Cloud felt his heart stop at the admission. Sephiroth was silent afterwards, obviously embarrassed at it himself.

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(Seph's POV)

Sephiroth was ashamed he had let so much slip to the _uke_, but he found it was very easy to talk to him; he never laughed at him or mocked him and he always seemed to understand him. Maybe for once in his life Sephiroth had found someone who understood him on a deeper level then the ice-General he was so fond of presenting.

Pushing aside his revelation he helped Cloud pull his pants back up, missing the long, slightly muscled legs, and did the same to his own pants, the leather making his already sensitive legs itch. Cloud poked his head out of the alley blessing that all people in Nibelheim seemed to go to bed rather soundly and exactly at ten. "We're good." He whispered over his shoulder to Sephiroth. But the General didn't want the _uke_ to leave him quite yet.

He took a step forward to embrace him, but suddenly a sound like nails on a chalkboard ripped through his mind. It crippled him and he cried out and fell to his knees. He could see through hazy eyes Cloud hovering over him, looking worried. The noise hit a screaming crescendo and Sephiroth smashed his hands onto his ears, digging his nails hard into his scalp as if hoping the pain of this would distract him from the pain in his mind. He again felt that alien presense.

'_Hello, my Child…_'

Just as the distinctly female voice slipped like a snake into his aching mind everything stopped and he released his head in a startled gasp. He slumped forwards, weak from the strain on his already tired and aching mind. Cloud was there to catch him.

Although he too was knocked off of his feet by Sephiroth's weight his warmth and comforting murmurs in his ear were enough for Sephiroth to feel the pain in his head lessening. Eventually it faded to a point where he could open his eyes again and sit back on his knees, leaving his hands on Cloud's legs which had acted as a pillow for his head only moments ago.

The image of those silky legs wrapped around him flashed into his mind and he allowed himself a small smile. Cloud's soft hand slipping down his cheek had him focusing blurred eyes on the smaller blonde. His concern for Sephiroth was apparent in every line in his face and in those eyes that had shown him emotions he had never even felt for himself. He loved those eyes; they seemed to see straight through the cold exterior he presented to every other mortal. This unnerved him as much as it amused him.

He grabbed his hand and stilled its journey. He brought the quivering fingertips to his lips and kissed them. He heard the hitch in breathing of the blonde and this egged him on. He licked them next, quick laps with his tongue that made the _uke_ gasp. What made him want this seemingly frail creature so badly? What made him so enticing to him? And why was holding him just enough?

Deciding he had enough problems he dropped Cloud's hand and stood slowly, hating that his vision spun. "Sephiroth…you can tell me what's wrong." Sephiroth's eyes slid onto the now-standing boy and stuck there. His comment had sounded like so many delivered by Zack countless times in the past and yet this felt different somehow; like he would actually take this to heart.

He didn't answer, unsure of what his answer would be, and instead took his hand and led him back to the hotel giving him the ceremonial kiss just outside the door. This kiss was always slow and drawn-out, and he allowed himself this time to savour the sweet honey taste of his _uke_.

His lips trailed downwards this time, briefly wanting a taste of the soft skin on his neck. His lips lingered and he let them rest over the place where he knew he would leave the stark impression of possession he so desired to imprint on him. It would be the first time he had ever marked a lover and none had ever been brave enough to try to mark the Great Sephiroth. They had feared him even in his most vulnerable moments of lovemaking. But it had never been about "love" making in the past it had always been something required, methodic, something he needed to survive.

This was new to him, these feelings the boy brought up in him; possession, vulnerability, ache, need, compassion and fear. For a stark fear was there, a fear of loosing what he had now and knew he would never have again, fear for the safety of his lover, fear of what would happen to both of them if he let this unknown presense in him take over.

For there was no doubt in his mind the intentions of this force were anything but evil. And fear of what he would do to the boy. He felt a fierce desire to protect him, shelter him as he had done for him just minutes ago. He only hoped he had such feelings and capacity in him. Never having had such feelings before he found they were almost too-overwhelming for him to handle.

When dealing with personal emotions in the past, Sephiroth had always found in that the path of least resistance was the usually the best measure, so he followed old habits and pushed all his troubling thoughts from his mind; having done it many times in the past, it was only slightly more difficult now.

He decided he needed to focus more on the odd dreams he had been having along with the spaces in his memory in which he had no re-count of what he had done. Cloud seemed to sense he was troubled as Sephiroth pulled away from him, retreating from the one place he felt as if all these problems could, and would, disappear, which was in Cloud's embrace.

And yet the problems he faced, that disappeared in his arms, were the exact things keeping him from those arms- that obviously loving embrace. Cloud spoke suddenly, responding to Sephiroth's sombre thoughts:

"What I said before still holds. My feelings for you won't fade, and although I don't expect you to return my…affections, I just want you to know my feelings for you mean I care about you and would rather take any pain you feel onto myself. But, considering I have no idea what's wrong, I fear there's no way I can help you. And I exist to help you Sephiroth." Cloud's speech reached into Sephiroth, dragging up those feelings he kept trying to banish from his mind, they never stayed far from his thoughts long he noticed, and in that moment he knew that Cloud was in no sense a boy; no more then he was.

His eyes strayed to the bit of his tempting collar-bone that poked over the collar of his uniform and imagined what he wanted to see, although there was nothing but smooth, unmarred skin. He would never be able to mark him, never be able to be with him.

His confession of love was contained in marring that skin, and until he could he felt he would never be able to let him know he was beginning to care for him; that holding him would be enough; listening to him, and confiding in him would be possible. This had started as something physical; mainly Sephiroth's undeniable attraction to his body, and until he had slain his need for said body he could never posses him and love him. He closed his eyes almost painfully.

It would never come about, he felt that. Cloud was destined for great things, and Sephiroth's soul and life already belonged to ShinRa, until his death. He knew this with a frightening certainty. His mind darkened; he felt straying from the methodic ceremony that was his life with ShinRa would only result in disaster.

There was some force trying to take him over, something evil and conniving. Only more reason to distance himself from Cloud. He refused to let him be hurt, definitely not by him. To protect him he would need to stay away from him. Why this made his whole existence seem pointless was unknown to him, so he gave Cloud one last kiss, short and smooth.

He felt the _uke_ sensed his intentions and he whispered his name, pleading in his eyes, those eyes that would always be his downfall, and he closed his own again. He knew if he opened them he would see everything he was thinking was foolish and instead of leaving him he would sweep him into his arms and fly them far from this oppressive place…if he only had the strength to open his eyes, to face all his fear and doubts…

Sephiroth turned his back to a pained Cloud and entered the Inn, leaving a slightly crippled blonde to reach out one hand in a final begging, a final plea, and he felt each of those quivering fingers, remembered their hot touch and smooth, loving caresses even as he stood behind the thick wood of the door.

He felt as if he would collapse, but instead he made his way to his room, not looking back. He had never had to.

'_Now that you have given up on love, come to me; I will heal the pain, I can make it all go away, it will all be right again…_'

He closed his eyes and silently nodded, agreeing with the perverted comfort the sinuous female's vocals brought, and when he opened them again the fires of Nibelheim were ignited in them with stunning ferocity.

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(Cloud-kun POV)

Cloud didn't go back to his bed until dawn had begun to stretch greedy fingers into the once-dark and concealing night. Not wishing to be caught in its rays, Cloud trudged inside. He curled into as small of a ball as was possible and replayed the whole night in his mind over and over.

Sephiroth confused him to no end. First he was making love to him harshly as if venting hidden pain or anger of some kind, then he was holding him and cuddling him, then he was collapsing, and then kissing him passionately, then acting reserved and quiet and finally leaving him in a way and manner that Cloud seemed to sense was a farewell. He changed so quickly from mood to mood it was hard to keep up with.

He sensed there was something wrong with the General that was making him so unbalanced and throwing him off. If he really was leaving him-Cloud felt his heart stop and his body quake at the thought-then why did this feel right?

Not in his mind or heart, but in that part of him that seemed more connected to outside forces other then his body and soul. Ever since he was a child he had seemed to possess an odd kind of awareness and knowing that had often scared his mother; he had always predicted when something was going to happen, something important, he had seemed to _feel_ when something fateful was going to happen to him or things around him. As if he could sense _fate_ itself.

He had always listened to this sixth sense and it had always made sense to him when the augury was confirmed, but now he refused to believe _this_ was what was supposed to happen; but then again, he had felt from the beginning of their trysts and start of a relationship that it was out of the natural balance of things.

It hadn't felt right, according to his sixth sense, but he had never been so happy in his life so he had ignored it. And now look what had happened because of it; he had lost Sephiroth forever. Maybe he should just accept this fate…after all how could he, Cloud Strife a scrawny insignificant lowly Cadet, change something ordained by fate? Something that was meant to happen is meant to happen. It was that simple.

He had never been able to fight his sixth sense and when he did the problem only multiplied. He cursed his stupidity and listened as Zack rose sluggishly. Oh yeah, they were supposed to go to the reactor today. Cloud had almost completely forgotten. He would have to see the General; it would be hard.

Just sitting in the same truck as him and not being acknowledged had torn him in two; but now, when Sephiroth really was trying to avoid him, how would he cope? As Zack whined at him to get up, Cloud thought: '_Not well…_'

………….

(AN: I'm just gonna skip this whole part at the reactor, it all went down like it did in the game, nothing changed, you don't like my laziness, stuff it up yer butt.) (Honestly, I just don't remember much of it; it's been sooo long since I've played…)

"Hello? Cloud? Are you receiving?" Cloud jumped and focused on Zack who was waving a large hand in front of his dazed face. "Oh yeah, sorry Zack." He scrambled mentally to reign in his sorrowful thoughts. Zack shrugged and moved to his duffel bag, digging around for some clean clothes; he was getting ready to take a shower. Cloud found himself slipping back into his memories of that day at the reactor.

It had been horrible. Cloud had seen as soon as the General had arrived something was off. He had been almost silent the entire time, which wasn't entirely uncommon, but it felt wrong today. His eyes had never even strayed to Cloud, and when he had spoken to him, asking him to guard Tifa (which had been _awkward_, considering she was completely unaware of his identity, still) his eyes had held so much indifference. '_That was not Sephiroth…_' Cloud found himself thinking.

And somehow he felt that Sephiroth was the right Sephiroth. Even though his sixth sense told him all was now on the right track he still suffered from a horrible stabbing pain in his heart, but even more so now, a concern for Sephiroth weighed this out most of the time.

If he wasn't entirely himself, then could he be blamed for his actions? Cloud hoped not. After they had returned he had shut himself in the ShinRa Mansion. Zack had tried to talk to him, but apparently he was completely unresponsive, only reading as if the secret of immortality existed in those musty tomes.

Cloud didn't dare go near him by himself even though Zack had told him to. Sephiroth must have no desire to see him. It felt like that anyways. He felt like Sephiroth was slipping farther from him, farther then he'd been even before when they were intimate, but now he was slipping farther away in Cloud's sixth sense and in his heart and mind. Farther from sanity then he had ever been.

Something was definitely wrong…but how could he help if Sephiroth didn't want to see him? How could he save the man he loved?

TBC!

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AN: Wow. Another chapter done. And maybe two more to go, three at the most. There will be one more lemon, although it will be kinda cheesy, so don't yell at me, and then it's time for the tragedy and the actual story to happen! I know, that's boring, but I kinda feel motivated to write something really angsty, so here you go!

And sorry this is kinda all over the place, especially with Sephiroth's train of thought, it's just there a lot I wanted to get in on what he thought about Cloud and everything and why they couldn't be together yadda yadda, before he went insane. Because insane Sephie-sama is HOT, but not good for deep conversations. At least I guess not. I've never met him, I can't say.

Anyways, sorry this took a bit longer, but I had to develop the plot. Literally. And although this is titled after the Laruku song AS IF IN A DREAM (which is really good) I was actually inspired byfour songs in this chapter. For the lemon: Umbrella by Dir en Gray and Escapism by An Café (DOWNLOAD THIS!). For the mushy parts, which there was a lot of (--;;): Move Along by the Rejects (I don't get it either…it just seemed to work) and a new song (as of tonight) that I finished this on: Michiyuki by Kaori Hikita, which for all the anime savvy is the ending to Loveless (which is AMAZING if you're a Yaoi-otaku like me…--;;). This really works with the chapter, and it's soooo pretty, so download it! I command you! Done ranting now.

This chapter is dedicated to the Ghost of Todd, because his review was so wonderful and it made my heart fly, (I'm so over-dramatic, but never a dull moment!) so here's to you mate! And to everyone else who reviewed, you are my heartbeat, thank you! Review me, but no flames please!

LOVE!

Kurai-Tenshi of Doom

PS: As a side-note, I'm asking a lot of you be'loved readers for belief suspension in this story, like for instance Cloud's age is off by a year or two when compared to Sephie-sama, but I just felt sixteen wasn't yet mature enough, especially since this is a Cloud before he suffered all he suffered (;-;), and how many days they spend in Nibelheim, etc., but no-one's complained so far, I'm somewhat bending this to my own will, so forgive me if it pisses you off! I'm sorry haha…no, I really am sorry. Peace all!


	5. Pt 5 TRUST

Marks

Part Five:

AN: Wow. Five parts. Well, it's officially not a one-shot haha…I'm such a liar. Well, anyways, this will be kinda weird/happy because I'm listening to DeG (Merciless Cult, download it it's kick ass) (which is odd because they're so dark sometimes, I'm such a freak…) and Miyavi's amazing CD Galyuu and Origa's CD Era of Queens (she does the openings for GITS the anime), and I'm not sure if there will be a lemon in this chapter.

I kinda hope there is, but if there isn't there won't be another for the rest of this fic. This will have made a significant transition from in-denial smut to a real story fic! (Insert dramatic gasp here!) So yeah, I can't give a crude warning this time around (cries). Oh well, this is where Sephie goes insane! Mua-ha-ha. You will all (hopefully) finally see what I've been hinting at this whole time (rubs hands evilly). I'm thinking I should write these AN's after I write the chapter, so then I know what's going to happen….

Un-claimer: See previous chapter…

Holy crackers, it's long. Grab some munchies and a good CD

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(Cloud's POV)

Cloud sat on the edge of the fountain watching the ShinRa Mansion longingly. He wracked his mind for what had to be the thousandth time for some way to help him; some way to pull the man he loved back from the edge of something he had danced along since birth. Cloud buried his aching head in his hands feeling tears rise.

Sephiroth had been the only good thing to happen to him in his life; he was a miracle Cloud thanked the heavens for every day, even before the man had showed any interest in him, and now he was loosing him. That sense of wrongness had disappeared in Cloud along with Sephiroth. So what did that mean? This was _supposed_ to happen? This miserable future was the right one?

Cloud jumped up, fists clenched. He refused to believe that. "Cloud?" Cloud jumped as an exhausted, raspy voice sounded from behind him and called him back to the present. Zack stood behind him. The man looked a mess. He was thin from constant vigil by the barred door of the library where Sephiroth had secluded himself and his skin was so much paler beneath his tan then usual it scared Cloud.

He placed a hand on his friend's shoulder, worry etched in his face. "Cloud, he's in a frenzy and he's asking for you. At least I think he is, who knows what the crazy bastard is thinking, hm?" Zack grinned the smile a ghost of what it had once been. Cloud smiled warmly back, appreciating the man's thin attempt at humour in such a tense situation.

"Go and sleep Zack you've been more then supportive of him. Let someone else take over for a bit." Cloud saw the slight surprise in Zack's face at the obvious maturity in his statement. He patted Zack on the shoulder one last time as he walked around him and took a deep breath on his walk up to the Mansion.

He lost himself in troubled thoughts, mostly of his horrid childhood and when his eyes alighted on Tifa's house he grimaced. It had been so awkward at the reactor, but he had hoped his cover hadn't been blown, after all he didn't want her, or anyone else from this stupid town, to know of his failure quite yet. His thoughts took him all the way to the library door without mishap.

He could feel him, just beyond that door stood the man he loved, and with the same accuracy in which he detected him he also felt the suffering he was in. Something was wrong; it felt as if Sephiroth was trapped, or in pain. "General?" Cloud called out, knowing full-well he could be heard throughout the library. Sephiroth could hear him.

He knocked hard, just in case his meek voice had been too soft. "General?" he repeated forcing his voice to a powerful boom that surprised even himself. He supposed it was from the slight nervous fear that had overtaken him. He cleared his throat as he heard a faint sound of thick boots hitting the hard-wood floor. It was muffled by the dust but when Cloud placed his ear to the cold door he could hear it almost like a paced heart-beat. His own heart had started its pounding escape from his chest. Something was definitely wrong.

"Sephiroth! Please, answer me, it's Cloud!" Why he felt his identification would make any difference was beyond him; if Zack hadn't been able to snap him out of it, why should he be able to? The slow heart-beat stopped. He had his attention.

Feeling the power of Sephiroth's undivided attention had him speaking again, albeit being slightly flustered: "Please Seph, something's wrong we can all feel it, and we're worried, Zack and I. We want you to come out and talk to us. I want to talk to you…I miss you." Cloud didn't like how pitiful he sounded with this admission, but it must've affected Sephiroth because the beating of his boots came closer. This was not lost on Cloud.

"Please Seph…let me in. I care about you and want to be with you." Another admission he regretted. He was sure this would scare Sephiroth off, but it did the opposite. The sound of grating and a squeak from a protesting door was the noise that made Cloud's heart stop. Relief flooded through him as he realised the crack was just enough for him to slip through.

Taking another deep, steadying breath he slipped through scraping his cheek painfully on the frame. He clasped the cut as he observed his surroundings. The library was dark and dank. Sephiroth had one lamp lit and it was in the back section so the light only cast a small dim dirty yellow halo on the narrow hallway of bookshelves that led to it.

Cloud was surprised by the mess and disorder, knowing full-well how neat and organised Sephiroth normally was. He was further surprised to see that Sephiroth stood nowhere near the door. He hovered in a dark corner opposite of Cloud. Cloud could feel him there more then see him. "Seph?" His voice was weak and timid in light of seeing his hero and lover in such a state.

The silver-haired beauty emerged and the shadows at his back fell around him like a cape. He looked almost the same as before to any who barely knew him. But Cloud saw him as if he had undergone a transformation in the short days he had imprisoned himself in this nasty hovel called a library.

There had always been in Sephiroth some hint of a caged animal; something untamable and unreachable. Something some called madness, but it had always been below; an apathetic, calm exterior that radiated intimidation. Now that animal was free and it roared in his Mako-glowing eyes, the only other source of light in the room besides the dirtied halo. They glittered eerily and not with the warm richness Cloud usually spotted in them. They were still beautiful, yes, but in a way that terrified him.

Something had happened to him, changed him, warped him. His face was drawn and his already slim, muscled body was now thin with lack of sustenance. His eyes looked gaunt in a too-skinny face and his normally silky rich gray hair was now dirty and tangled. There were dark circles under his eyes enunciated horribly by the sickly paleness of his once beautiful skin.

But aside from all that his outer appearance to, once again, those untrained, seemed normal and un-placed. But Cloud knew better. He saw that beast in his eyes he saw the capability it had and he saw-no felt-that somewhere in those glowing eyes the old Sephiroth fought for control and for his sanity.

He had always tottered precariously on the edge between madness and sanity and now one whole foot appeared over that jagged edge. "Seph…" Cloud trailed off hurt and fear for his lover bright in his eyes. With his whisper the old Sephiroth seemed to win for a moment and obvious confusion flittered across his face. "C-Cloud?" he stuttered and Cloud nodded showing his relief for Sephiroth's recognition.

"How can I help you Seph?" he asked, urgency clear in his voice. "Help me? Why am I sick?" Almost like a child Sephiroth lifted his hand to his face and long fingers felt the taut skin and prominent cheek-bones. Then his eyes widened in fear. "_She_'s taken over hasn't she? I've been fighting _Her_ ever since we came, but she won the other day at the reactor, _She's_ in my mind and she's taking over, Cloud I can only escape in my sleep, but now she won't even let me do that…" Cloud was shaking now.

"How do I fight her Seph?" he asked voice quiet. The silver-haired man shook his head sadly. "You can't. She won't let me go and I don't have the strength to fight her anymore. She's too strong." "I can put you to sleep Seph; will that help you fight her?" Sephiroth finally looked to him, his eyes glassy and far from the library and Cloud. "She's coming back…" he whispered. "What?" Cloud stuttered, confused by his sudden change.

Then, as Cloud watched his eyes visibly changed from the bewilderment of a bruised child to that of a mad beast. Sephiroth scowled at him and bared still-white teeth. "Get out. I don't need your help or anyone else's! And tell that man who keeps standing outside to leave me alone as well!" Cloud bit his bottom lip. It was true, he had a sleep spell, but it was weak, and against the great Sephiroth how well would it truly fare? Just then a gasp came from the still-open doorway.

"Cloud how did you-?" Zack stopped abruptly and faced Sephiroth. He too sensed the change and saw the animal Sephiroth had dubbed "_She_". "Hi Seph. How you doing?" His voice was cautious, his eyes riveted to the still ferocious face before him. "Get the hell away from me!" Sephiroth, no this wasn't Sephiroth Cloud reminded himself, the creature hissed.

"Seph we just want to help…" Zack trailed off, pain flashing onto his face just for a moment at his harsh words. "Zack, can you cast a sleep spell?" Cloud asked from the corner of his mouth. Zack kept his eyes on Seph, but stood next to him and answered lowly. "Yeah, why?" "Because the real Sephiroth said he could only escape in sleep, in dreams, and we both know this thing before us truly isn't Sephiroth." Zack's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "You didn't actually think you were the only one who knew him so well did you?" Cloud demanded, slightly offended.

"No, I'm just glad I'm not insane and someone else sees it as well. Methinks you might be able to reach him in sleep. How tired are you?" The Sephiroth/creature before them snapped: "Get the fuck away from me!", as Cloud answered: "Put me to sleep as well, then place me next to him so our hands are touching." They had kept their voices low in the few seconds they had spoken, but in that time the thing before them had raised his hand, fire spell churning in his palm, but Zack was a First Class SOLDIER and he was just as ready shooting him with a powerful sleep spell.

The creature's eyes widened for a second before he dropped to the dusty floor with a thick thud. A cloud of dust rose when he fell and Cloud was at his side in moments. "What do you think is doing this to him?" he asked eyes and voice wandering as he inspected the sleeping man. Zack's eyes were on him as well. "I have no idea, but it definitely messed with something that already wasn't right in him…I think this…thing has been there all this time and just took something to jostle it and make agitate it. If I didn't know him I would never have known there was anything wrong save lack of sleep and food. How long has he been without?" Cloud shrugged. "I think this creature is keeping him alive…" he trailed off and looked up to Zack.

"Put me to sleep, now." Zack's eyes widened slightly before he sighed, shook his head then whispered the words under his breath. The last thing Cloud saw was Sephiroth's chest underneath him rising to meet his head.

………………………………….

(Seph's POV)

He didn't know where he was. He had been here for an eternity it felt like. Trapped in his own mind. There was darkness everywhere and he could barely move. He was cold, freezing, and hungry, but he couldn't get to his body. How he could be separated from it he had no idea. And _She_ kept bothering him. She would come when he felt like his imprisonment would never end and her voice would drift through him and around him like a snake through the grass.

'_Just envelop the darkness; let it become you. You have nothing in this world to call you back, no reason to live; you are a slave of Shin-Ra as I was. now I am here to save you to take away all the pain you have felt all these years, just let me take over and control your body; I will give you power and immortality and best of all no-one will ever be able to hurt you ever again, my son. You will be safe from that evil boy and his seductive deception. He doesn't love you, and you can never love him, he can never be yours' you can never have him. The vixen knew this the whole time and still he lead you on, for your beauty, your body, your power…he used you…' _

'No! Cloud said he loved me….' he fought back, not willing to believe _Her_.

'_If he loves you so much then why doesn't he let you declare him yours'?_'

'Because…because…' Sephiroth had no answer for her, and as he thought about that he began to forget that look Cloud used to give him so full of respect and awe and admiration…and full of love. He began to forget the wonderful feel of his skin and how nice it felt to hold him, how he felt like in him he had found a person who understood him, and not only that but accepted him for all his faults. He forgot his sweet honey flavour and all too soon he was sleeping less.

When he had slept before he had placed himself in a wonderful field of flowers, some place so serene and innocent he could picture lying here with Cloud and this thought had preserved him, but now that he had forgotten his _uke_ he had no need for the dream and he began to let _Her_ control more and more of him. He soon stopped sleeping and dreaming all together.

It was his name, ringing softly through the darkness of his mind-prison that woke him up and allowed small trickles of memories to come back to him. He remembered spiky golden hair and fair skin with large, innocent sea-blue eyes that were sometimes the colour of a storming sky.

Another sounding of his name and he heard pain and caring there. Concern for him, and yes, that was right, there was someone who cared for him, someone who had…loved him. There was someone worth fighting _Her_ for. And then _She_ was back. '_Do not listen to his lies my son! He only wishes to hurt you further!_'

For once Sephiroth ignored _Her_ and he blinked as flashes of a dark, dank room came before his eyes. Then he saw small dust clouds from where booted feet made a steady straight pace across the floor. His feet he realised. There was that voice, the one that had guided him back to his body. Sensing he didn't have long he walked out of the light of the back circular room and into the cobwebby darkness of the room before it. A library he realised as he almost tripped over a stray book on the floor.

He watched his further footing and stretched out with powers that were somewhat alien and yet familiar to him and opened the door before him just a crack. And then _She_ reared her ugly head and he was thrown back into the limbo that was his mind. 'No!' he cried out, indignant. He threw his fists into the air like a child and called back what little memories he had of this person he knew cared about him. Little else came, aside from the flavour of honey in his mouth. This confused him so he swallowed thickly and listened hard.

As he'd expected his name came again, this time in a voice almost broken by the sight of him. It made his until-now-forgotten heart pound and ache for the pain in the voice and he pondered why he wished to never hear it again. Then he was back and looking through eyes that were his. He was hungry, thirsty and exhausted. This almost toppled him, and would have, had he not caught sight of the sunny-haired youth before him. And then it came back.

"C-Cloud?"

'_Cloud Strife was in love with him. He was the one worth living for.' _

His mind screamed at him He also remembered Zack, his comrade and friend. He was suddenly confused as to how he had been manipulated as such and he knew it showed on his face. His eyes darted away from Cloud unable to stand the pity and fear for him that was in his eyes. 'If I could sleep I might be able to call to him…' His thoughts scrambled for a way to tell him this.

"How can I help you Seph?" His name made him look back to him, eyes far and thinking he rambled before the true statement sunk in. 'Sleep! I need sleep!' And then _Her_ voice snaked into his mind sending a jagging pain through it. '_Remember you are too weak to fight me…_' And another shock of pain like a lightening bolt had him reeling back into his mind.

Again trapped in the prison. but if it had worked, if his point had gotten across perhaps there could be a way…if he could only hold her off long enough to take Cloud to that place he had pictured them in; that had kept him his sanity for that brief stretch of time. He would wait until Cloud saved him.

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(Cloud-kun POV)

(KU-KU-RU!)

(Sorry Meev-tan is contagious…--;;)

(Warning: Some mushy stuff )

(Oh bite me; I've been good with it so far!)

Cloud's eyes opened and for a few brief moments he was blinded by white light. '_I'm dead?_' His mind whirled, all the stereotypes of the proverbial white light coming to him. Then his hazy vision cleared and he saw the white surrounding him brilliantly wasn't a beacon into the world beyond but merely sunlight.

His brow furrowed as he sat up and looked into the bluest sky he had ever seen. Two cottony clouds drifted towards him, barely obscuring the bright sunlight. He looked to his pale skin, only appearing whiter in the bright light and was aware of the fact that even though the sunlight beat on him he was far from over-heated, and he relished the comforting warmth it brought to his chilled skin.

He licked dry lips and realised he sat on a plush bed of grass dotted with the occasional flower nestled deep within the soft bed. Everything about the endless field of grass and flowers spoke of peace. A tranquil feeling seeped through Cloud causing him to forget why he had been transported into this dream-world in the first place.

"Cloud…?"

The spell of the euphoric field before him was broken with the resonation of the too-familiar voice from behind him. Cloud swiveled in his still sitting position and looked up to his reason for being in this place at all. Sephiroth looked down on him, somehow appearing more ethereal then the field surrounding him.

His eyes and face appeared mildly bewildered as he had when Cloud had seen him fight that creature inside him and win just earlier in the library. As he thought of the musty library his memories of how he had gotten to this place and what his purpose was came back to him. He stood, legs shaking slightly. He found his balance and looked into the eyes of the great General.

He was the same, if not slightly different. Before his eyes had been cold and emotionless, now they were alive, but with confusion and fear. He looked like a lost child. As he stared at him Cloud realised Sephiroth had never been the unfeeling shell everyone thought him to be; he was only afraid of being hurt. He could understand that, he knew the feeling.

Something had happened to him, damaged him in some way that had caused him to withdraw from the normal fabric of reality so firmly he could only return when broken, as he had been now. That was the word to describe him-broken. "Seph…" Cloud trailed off, not quite knowing what to say in light of his dawning comprehension. It all made sense now about the cold General. But what had injured him so bad that he had pulled away so completely from everything? What had first broken him?

"Is that really you? Or am I just dreaming again?" Cloud tried to get used to this uncharacteristic Sephiroth who openly displayed emotion. It threw him off slightly, but he took a step forward and offered his warmest smile, hoping his love and concern radiated in it as deeply as he felt it.

"You're asleep, but I'm real. I'm here to help." Sephiroth's lips parted disbelief evident on the new features that emanated feeling. He stepped towards Cloud, hand reaching out and curling into Cloud's hair. Cloud smiled and leaned into his touch, letting him feel the surrender he was giving. "Here, here I don't have to worry about them…about _him_, about _Her_, we're free." His eyes widened in shock and something that looked like hope.

"I can finally mark you as mine…" Cloud looked into his eyes, noticing they had never been more beautiful then with that small glimmer. "I've always been yours'." Cloud answered, face and voice showing obvious surprise that Sephiroth had not known something so obvious.

His eyebrows shot up. "Seph…didn't you know? Don't you know how completely and entirely I am yours'? You've marked me already; you did the first time you reached back for me in the bathroom that night. Don't you know how my heart beats for you? How I breathe for you, how I wait for the next moment in which I can see you? How I offer myself to you each and every time with all the love I posses? I thought it was obvious how I would never lie with any other being, ever."

Sephiroth's hand trailed from his hair to his cheek and then traced his jaw-bone. Cloud closed his eyes and leaned closer to him before turning his face and kissing his palm. He felt Sephiroth's sharp intake of breath before he was embraced hard and pulled flush against him. The General was no longer in his ceremonial garb, ditching it for a white shirt that buttoned up the front and had been left open to expose a flat muscled stomach. The black leather pants still clothed him, looking more then spectacular. Cloud was almost relieved he hadn't dressed like this more often; he was just too seducing. He felt he would've jumped the General much sooner if he had walked around Shin-Ra clothed like that for a day.

He nuzzled his head securely into the crook of his neck and collar bone, placing a butterfly kiss on the tender skin. Another slight gasp and then he was pulled up and their lips met. The kiss was so unlike all their others' it surprised Cloud. This wasn't passion-ridden and wild with the final intent being sex, no this kiss was slow and sweet and Sephiroth made sure to taste every bit of him as slowly as possible.

Somehow this made the whole experience completely new for Cloud; he had never been kissed so thoroughly or so gently. His hands rested on Sephiroth's chest, his eyes closed tightly enjoying every bit of the kiss. Then it ended and both gasped and stared into each others' eyes. It was an odd moment; as if he were truly seeing Sephiroth for the first time. "Cloud I-" Cloud smiled and kissed his neck softly. He could see the hard thumping pulse in his throat and knew his heart mirrored that rhythm.

"Seph, I love you." And as if he were hearing for the first time his eyes widened in shock and a very slight, very rare crimson band appeared on his cheeks and ears. It was the closest Sephiroth would ever come to being called adorable, Cloud decided. He averted his eyes, his half-lidded.

"You've said that a lot haven't you? I don't know why I never listened until now; it just seemed so impossible to me, impossible that anyone could ever, much less already had, pierced through the armor I placed around myself. That anyone had seen past the biting remarks and cold condescending. But I suppose…now, it took a dream, a place where I know reality has no purchase for me to really believe it; to really hear it." His eyes slid back to Cloud's and they held a smile not portrayed on his face.

The slight blush had faded, but Cloud still saw it in his mind. His surprisingly steady hand pulled aside his drab SOLDIER uniform to expose his left shoulder and collar-bone. "I won't tell if you don't." he whispered, mischief obvious in his glittering eyes and voice. Sephiroth looked to the exposed skin, then to Cloud's eyes and back again until he saw the hungry glint he recognised so well.

Then, before Cloud could register what was happening he had been thrown down and was flat on his back with Sephiroth straddling his lap. He had let go of his uniform collar and his skin had slid back beneath it, but as he looked into Sephiroth's eyes he saw something else new there coupled with the hunger of lust; a kind of loving appreciation.

His stomach turned over as Sephiroth lowered his face closer to him, their lips only a hair's-breadth from each other before Sephiroth smirked in an almost evil manner and diverted his path to Cloud's jaw-bone.

HAHA I LIED! WARNING, HOT AND STEAMY BISHIE LOVE-MAKING, ENJOY THE HOTNESS! (Had y'all going for a sec didn't I? Mua-ha-ha! Come on, this is MY fic!)

He trailed air-light kisses across Cloud's jaw and then slipped over his lips; he had been so close Cloud had felt his breath breezing his trembling lips. Sephiroth's trail of light kisses turned into more pressing ones' as he made a diagonal trail down Cloud's jaw to his neck, finally resting at his collar-bone.

Then he pulled away and watched Cloud's chest below him rise and fall harshly with his erratic breathing. His eyes turned thoughtful, then devious, the same slightly-evil smirk returning. Cloud knew this did not bode well for his rising passion. "I'm dreaming hmm? Then this uniform will not do…" he closed his eyes, lips pouted and brow furrowed in determination and Cloud felt his skin tingling all over until Sephiroth opened his eyes and grinned.

Cloud felt the new material brushing his skin and the breeze rustling peacefully through the field brushed his newly-bared skin. A black top, made of netting coated him and beneath his wide eyes and harshly-breathing chest was a pair of the shortest shorts he had ever seen in his whole life. Black leather they clung thickly and felt odd on his skin.

"Hmm…interesting." Cloud met Sephiroth's eyes and was terrified at the look of power there. "Don't be scared little one…" Sephiroth whispered, and then slid his hands down Cloud's chest, letting his long fingers brush one erect nipple. Cloud gasped and arched his back, not used to this slow seduction.

Their encounters had always been fast, both letting out pent-up desire. But this…this was murder. He tilted his head to the side, cheek resting against the grass. No sheets were softer, Cloud decided. When Sephiroth's lips danced over and across his bare collar-bone and then down, breath and lips ghosting over the fabric Cloud let out a small moan. His hands dug into Sephiroth's shoulders and he hoped his nails let him know just how frustrated he was.

And yet the kisses now making their way down his naval were sweet and demanded nothing. They made his blood boil, and yet he wasn't sure if he really wanted Sephiroth to do anything else. These kisses seemed to be expressing Sephiroth's feelings towards him. They treasured every inch of him, from top to bottom and took no small part for granted. It was loving.

Did Cloud dare hope his feelings were returned? That more then lust and hot passion existed inside Sephiroth when it concerned him? When Sephiroth found his inner thigh he forgot all his doubts and threw his head back, biting his bottom lip as the kisses continued downwards. They ended at his knees, Sephiroth's hands having stopped at his inner thigh and continued to massage gently where his lips had graced.

When he stopped, Cloud, slightly confused by his sudden discontinuation, looked to him and was slightly self-conscious to find himself being watched rather intently, as if he were being considered; like he was a puzzle and Sephiroth had lost a very important piece.

His hands reached down-he had to lean forward to reach him-and cupped his cheeks. His skin was hot to the touch and oh-so-silky just as he remembered. "You're so beautiful…" Sephiroth whispered, his eyes holding more meaning then the words. Cloud flushed an embarrassed crimson. "Nothing to you…" he whispered, watching Sephiroth's amazing eyes.

It was awe. That was what he saw there. Awe of him? This made his stomach turn and his heart sing, so Cloud ignored it and sat up just enough to kiss him gently. "I'm not a big fan of this netting, get it off me _seme-tan_…_onegai_?" he liked the sickly sweetness to his voice. It had an effect on Sephiroth and he closed his eyes and furrowed his brows again.

Cloud barely jumped as the tingling struck up again and the silly excuse for a shirt disappeared. Sephiroth moved back up and placed his hands on either side of Cloud's head. Cloud kept his hands lightly on his cheeks, forcing him to look into his eyes. Sephiroth smiled; it was a simple thing, un-tried and hesitant, but it seemed to express a happiness and tranquility that mirrored the surrounding environment.

Cloud was elated he was the one who allowed him such happiness; that he was the one to experience it. Sephiroth dipped and kissed him again, this one a bit more demanding and when he sucked Cloud's tongue into his mouth, Cloud let all his contained emotion into the kiss making it deep and hard. His hands moved down and wrapped around Sephiroth's hips pulling them tighter together. He moaned when Sephiroth's erection met his, both contained in leather.

Sephiroth laughed, a deep noise that rumbled and reverberated into Cloud's mouth. He pulled away and thrust his hips into Cloud making him moan. "I've yet to worship your body little one. I've kissed you in all places save one." Cloud looked up into Sephiroth's eyes, his own loosing the loving sweetness of before and now made of heat and desire.

Sephiroth slipped his body sinuously down Cloud's, using his arms to push himself and this made the _uke_ squirm and cry out: "Seph, please!" Sephiroth looked back to him and grinned before taking one nipple into his warm mouth. It was amazing to Cloud as he massaged his stomach while giving the other cherry-red nipple the same attention, swirling his tongue around the outside, finally sucking on the tip. Then he licked a path down Cloud's stomach and eyed the shorts of his choosing.

"You're letting me dress you in the future." He whispered against taut stomach muscles. "Only if you agree to walk around naked for the rest of your life." Cloud retorted, voice a rasp. Sephiroth laughed and Cloud felt the rumble of it against his thighs. He unconsciously spread his legs wider under Sephiroth's weight, accepting his body in the circle of his legs and the cradle of his thighs.

Sephiroth observed the zipper on the small shorts; it was the only thing separating him from Cloud. He lifted himself slightly and ripped open his shirt, buttons flying, before he threw it aside and took the zipper in his teeth. The member below jerked in anticipation. Sephiroth was slow to pull it down liking Cloud's bated breath.

When Cloud sprang free from the confinement he sighed as Sephiroth's strong tongue darted out and licked the tip causing his whole body to shudder before he moved his mouth lower towards Cloud's entrance. Suddenly Cloud was paralyzed. He hadn't even known this could be done, but as Sephiroth slipped his tongue inside him, once, twice, three times Cloud stopped caring what was and wasn't possible.

His moans and gasps accelerated and just as he felt the peak coming Sephiroth pulled away and in one expert movement took him fully into his mouth. Cloud screamed as his body shuddered and he exploded into Sephiroth's mouth. He lay panting after the stars behind his eyes cleared, tired, but far from spent. '_If I could only have dreams like this every night…_' he thought, one half-lidded eye watching Sephiroth sit up and lick his lips, eyes closed in rapture.

Then Seph's hands moved to his pants and in a moment he was kicking them off. He was bare-foot and Cloud marvelled at the delicate feet, so un-like the rest of him. If anything, he was the delicate one. He noticed his body seemed more feminine then Sephiroth's, more curved and fragile. His barely enunciated stomach muscles and pieces of anatomy seemed to be the only thing separating him from a woman. He hoped this didn't bother his _seme_, but when Sephiroth's eyes moved down his form, making him shudder, he knew he was being foolish.

He had made more then obvious how much he loved his body, but what of the rest of him? The look in his eyes when he had made his speech to Seph returned to him and for once he refused to listen to his doubts. '_He has to love all of me, I just know it!_' Cloud took the time of his arguing thoughts to appreciate the beautiful specimen that was Sephiroth.

He knew he loved all of this man, form his gruff looks and brief comments to the warm look he had seen in his eyes when he held him after making love, to his wonderful smell and fierce possessive instincts…everything about him was amazing. And now he hovered over Cloud again as he took his arms and held them over his head taking time to kiss him fiercely.

He placed himself near his entrance and broke away to look into his eyes. He pushed into him, going slowly and carefully. Cloud's eyes widened as he saw how much effort Sephiroth was putting into making this perfect. As he pulled out then pushed in slightly again Cloud wrapped his legs around his hips and pulled himself onto him. It hardly hurt at all now, and soon the too-familiar ache replaced it.

Surprising him suddenly, Sephiroth grabbed him around the back and pulled them both backwards. Cloud was now straddling him. Slightly un-used to this, he began an odd movement of hips and thighs soon finding his rhythm. His climax, and Sephiroth's, came fast, but it was barely enough. As he lay on Sephiroth's chest, panting and regaining his balance, Sephiroth was soon stroking him.

"I'm not quite done with you yet…you're still my _uke_, remember that." Then he had flipped them again and now having Cloud aroused began a brutal assault on his mouth that soon had him erect as well. He plunged into Cloud and pulled out slowly, taking his time and enjoying every slow stroke as much as Cloud did.

As Sephiroth made love to him it was slow, loving and endearing, he made sure they both enjoyed the experience and when Cloud climaxed and exploded again onto his stomach he felt Sephiroth's mouth burying itself in his shoulder. The bite was timed perfectly with his climax and the power of it drove his slightly-sharper-then-normal canines to puncture skin. It hurt, but it was a good kind of hurt.

As he slowly stopped trembling and came back to earth he pulled his mouth away and Cloud began to run his hands through his hair trying to ignore the twinge of the soon-to-scar mark. Sephiroth kissed it and then licked away the small pin-pricks of blood. He then eyed his handiwork. "Finally mine forever…" he whispered, looking at the mark that symbolised his love and adoration of Cloud.

………………….

(Change to Seph's POV)

He then proceeded to lick and suck three more marks: one on his opposite shoulder, another just above his left breast and the third just above his belly-button. Cloud was exhausted by this time and quickly slipping in and out of sleep. Sephiroth pulled him into his arms and laid on his side to pull him into a warm embrace.

"Seph…how can I help you fight _Her_?" Cloud's question was sudden and soft, but it had Sephiroth at attention his lazy tracing of small circles on Cloud's back stopping. His enjoyment of the closeness of their naked bodies faded as he remembered his captor.

"I don't know…" he said into Cloud's hair. Cloud pulled away and looked up into his eyes, "It's…it's Jenova, she's taken over my body. I mean…I think she's been inside me, somewhere, all along, she just needed an opportunity to take over…and I gave it to her. Seeing what we saw in the reactor troubled me and shook me enough to make me want to research the whole thing. The more I researched the more I discovered and the more disturbed I became until…my childhood memories made an appearance and then I lost it completely…she had convinced me that I couldn't have you, could never be with you, she had been manipulating me with these lies ever since we had come here. But now…now that you are mine, now that I've marked you and proven her wrong, now I think I can win…" His speech left Cloud stunned and silent.

………………………

(Back to Cloud-tan POV)

'_Maybe whatever happened to him in his childhood was what scarred him and made him so fragile inside…_' Cloud let the thought rise questions in him, questions he dared not ask Sephiroth now, not when he was so distressed. "But…how do we beat her then? If she's manipulating you-" Sephiroth cut him off suddenly with a sharp look and by slapping his hand onto his mouth.

"_She's_ found us…she's up. You have to go before she sucks you in as well! I don't know why or how, but she's…I mean I'm on the move…stop me Cloud. I don't care what it takes, if you have to kill me then do it, but don't let me escape with that beast in control!" His eyes were desperate as he shoved Cloud away.

Cloud sputtered, confused until Sephiroth kissed him fiercely; a possessive…goodbye kiss. "No!" Cloud shouted, reaching for him but grabbing only air. Suddenly blackness was everywhere and Cloud felt himself loosing conscious thought. Soon everything in his vision faded as well as he cried out for Sephiroth one last time….

…………….

(Still Cloud-tan POV)

Cloud moaned as he woke, placing a hand on his forehead. Suddenly everything in the dream came rushing back to him and a scream from somewhere near had his attention. Then he felt the flames. It was odd, usually when one thinks of fire, the smell, the feel the colours come to mind, but in Cloud's case he didn't feel the fire itself, didn't smell it, he felt the flames, each individual bit as it licked its way across decaying wood and the small town.

He was up in seconds, legs springing almost magically from the tingling bliss that had been his sleep into tight action that made his muscles cry in protest. He ignored the pain, knowing he would soon experience worse. He didn't like his macabre auguries, so he raced faster, tripping and landing harshly on his left knee on the dizzying staircase. A curse that could make a Turk blush slipped from his lips before he was up once again and running. More pain. Excellent.

He ran and ran, exploding from the door of the mansion and coming to a dead stop. The individual flames he smelt and felt all melded into a crescendo of heat and terror as his saucer-envious eyes took in his surroundings. '_No…No…NO!_'

A scream rent its way through the blood-hazed night, a scream full of anguish, despair, pain and betrayal; a scream of lost hope, of a hell-tortured soul.

It wasn't until Zack was in front of him shaking him, screaming at him that he realised that hellish scream came from his cracked, dry lips.

"Cloud, Cloud you have to wake up, snap out of it, come help me, Sephiroth's gone crazy, he's done all this and he won't stop! You have to help! Please Cloud, come back to me!" '_Sephiroth's gone crazy…_'

'_Seph…is crazy? He's finally snapped?_'

'_No! He was never crazy! Just misunderstood, just un-loved, that's why he needs me, he needs me to show him how much I care, that I understand!_'

'_He's killed innocent people, he's torched your hometown, and he's disappeared. This is not the Sephiroth you know!_'

'_You're right…this isn't the Sephiroth I know, the Sephiroth I…love. This isn't Sephiroth at all. This is the work of that _thing_ inside him! It's _Her_ fault! He needs my help._'

Cloud's eyes focused on Zack and the scream died on his lips as suddenly as it had slipped from them. "I'm going to find him Zack." "Cloud, help me with the townspeople, they're injured, they need assistance, please! Seph is on a rampage, he doesn't know anyone right now; if you go to him he won't know you! He'll kill you too!"

Cloud shook his head adamantly, eyes slightly dazed as if not all of his mind or sanity was currently with him; as if the rest were still in his dreams with Sephiroth. "No Zack. I'm going to find him." Cloud stepped around Zack and made his way towards the reactor, following instinct and the trail of destruction…

……………………………

He found Sephiroth easily. Barely seeing the crippled Tifa, he moved forwards, still in a daze and walked heavily up the stairs. '_This is wrong…you're not supposed to be helping him, this is all wrong._'

"If this is wrong I don't want to know what is right; if this isn't meant to be my destiny, then damn it all. I don't give a flying fuck what my destiny is if it involves me walking away from the man I love and leaving him to that bitch and madness." The declaration was made to the tension-ridden air, but it seemed to lift a large weight on Cloud and he suddenly found his jerky movements faster and smoother, as if a large veil of pressure had been lifted, and suddenly everything was clear to him; clearer then he ever could have imagined. He knew what he needed to do.

He would look back later on this moment and say it wasn't that what he was doing defied destiny, but instead felt like the righting of a mistake; a mistake that had been repeated continuously, and somehow, now, he had the strength to stand up and stop it. As he neared the thick metal door separating him from Sephiroth, no that _bitch_, he stopped, took a deep breath and with his exhale expelled all doubt before he stepped inside.

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(Sephie-sama POV)

Sephiroth was back in his prison, but now the fight had left him. He had accomplished his goal; he had seen Cloud, Cloud had come for him and he had left his mark on him…Cloud was his now irrevocably, without a doubt, and now that he had done this nothing else mattered.

Somehow his mind didn't care enough to process that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Cloud; he knew it, it just wasn't something to consider now. The less he thought of it, the tighter Jenova wound her shroud around him, restraining him more and more, pushing him farther and farther back into his own mind, pushing away the sanity. Soon he would go too far and would not come back.

So euphoric was his elation he barely even noticed. Not until he heard his name. Like a dying signal over a faulty radio; clinging with static and raspy. Once…twice…three times. Then a laugh, diabolical, mad, and triumphant. It took him only seconds to become aware that it was _Her_ using him, using his lips, his throat his voice. But who was calling him? It was Cloud wasn't it?

"I want to see him…" he called it out to no-one in particular, but his voice radiated through the darkness like rippled through a pool after a stone is dropped. And it caused something much like a ripple effect; the larger the ripples became, the more he realised he had been bound and captured in his own mind. Then he became aware of his bindings. Sometime in the course of dreaming about his marking of Cloud _She_ had slipped black bindings around his naked body.

His ethereal self struggled sleepily, like a waking child, until he heard Cloud again: "You own me now. Come and get me _seme-chan_…" More words from Jenova. Not his own. Anger licked him now and his fading, white form solidified and regained the colour of pale, peach skin.

His arms were tied to his sides, his legs bound as well, but as he struggled and summoned all the anger he possessed they slowly slipped and soon his hands were free, then his feet, then arms, then he ripped the binding from him and re-surfaced in his mind. He re-gained his vision as he heard an enraged shriek from Jenova. She pierced him then with a staggering pain that almost reeled him back inside himself.

But as he became aware of the sight around him and he spotted the blurred, petite cadet below him he fought back, imaging fighting her, throwing all his anger back at her, using his pain as ammunition. Another screech, this time from his lips before her creeping voice whispered to him seductively:

'_He's only here to deceive you, you woke up to him in the black-haired ones' arms, remember? He held him close and whispered to him to wake up, meanwhile leaving us on the cold floor to rot. He's a little whore, just because you've made love to him again doesn't mean he's sincere…he does this because he's jealous of our power and fears us, just like everyone you've ever known…you will never be understood or loved…_'

Cloud must've sensed her regaining control because he smiled warmly and in one swift movement ripped the top of his uniform from his torso, revealing the smaller, gentler physique. But it wasn't his chest that had Sephiroth's attention. It was the mark, stark against the flushed skin, blatant and proud. His mark was still there…Cloud's eyes glittered.

"Now you've marked me Seph…go ahead, give in to her, but I'll warn you, I will follow you wherever your madness takes you, to the ends of the Planet. I will always be there, whether you're sane enough to see me or not. I can't stop loving you now. And I think you can't stop loving me either."

"LIAR! You little slut, you're only going to hurt him and destroy him, you envious little conniving-"

"Mother."

Jenova's stream of indignations came to an abrupt halt as Sephiroth closed his eyes and focused everything he had into regaining control.

"Shut up."

"How dare you, you little bastard, I've been the only one who cares for you all these years, the only one to blink an eye towards you-" "Why don't you just leave me alone bitch?" She attacked him again, one last fierce strike, and he found his vision reeling away and the crush of blackness of his conscious enveloping him. He cried out, and fought back, directing everything he had at her, pushing her back.

They locked themselves in a battle of wills, Jenova whispering evil words, he ignoring it all and merely focusing on pushing her back. "Seph…come back to me. Come back to us…" Jenova slipped, unnerved by the more-then-obvious love in the boy's voice below him. Sephiroth took the opportunity and focused all of his remaining strength into a final blow, a spell to throw her out of him for good, forever. Fire-red light exploded from his conscious and Jenova's steady shrieking pounded into his eyes, ears and mouth, filling his entire being as the heat and strength of his attack struck her.

And suddenly, when she surged back towards him, perhaps thinking she could overpower him in the midst of attack Sephiroth felt a warm hand touching his physical form's own. The touch brought him back to his own body with a harsh slap and expelled Jenova from him in a rush of wailing and curses. The first thing he saw when his vision cleared was Cloud, eyes worried, but gentle smile lighting his face all the same, keeping himself assured.

Above him he felt a great movement of power. He looked up and saw the most disgusting, vile creature ever, so wretched looking he almost pitied it. It opened its gash of a mouth and shrieked hideously before swooping into the Jenova specimen behind them. Cloud's eyes widened in fear as the thing behind them in the glass began to spasm. "Kill it!" he cried, pointing behind him. Finding Masamune where he had left it previously the abnormally-long blade was through the creature in seconds, followed by an explosive Fire 3 spell that ignited the entire room.

Sephiroth looped an arm around Cloud and focused all of his power into shielding them. Flames and bits of twisted metal bounced over them and around them, although a trembling Cloud pushed into the powerful curve of Sephiroth's body, and Sephiroth himself remained un-touched. Sephiroth leapt into the air and propelled them backwards and out of the room.

The one outside of it, with all the monstrous creations of Hojo and Shin-Ra went up much in the same fashion as the Jenova specimen had. Still backwards Sephiroth flew them, and in seconds they were out of the reactor. As soon as his feet made purchase on the outside ground the reactor collapsed onto itself and the remains incinerated. In moments there was only ash left. Sephiroth watched the rising flames as they licked the sky, and then faded into small clusters on the ground.

Suddenly he became aware of extra weight. He looked down and over the blonde spikes of a rather shocked Cloud he saw a girl. His brow furrowed. Cloud had her by the arm, and had apparently pulled her from the destruction somewhere along their flight. Confusion flooded him as he tried to think of how, then when Cloud's shock-white face rose to him and his too-wide eyes met his he smiled down at his shaking, still shirtless lover and whispered: "I lo…" before he collapsed backwards in a dead faint, Cloud and a un-conscious Tifa landing atop him.

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(Sephie-sama POV still )

He woke up later. How 'later' he didn't know. His sleep had been dreamless; comforting, warm and healing. Not only were his body and mind healing from the exhaustion but he used the sleeping time to scan his mind for any sign of _Her_, that unknown presense that had always lingered forebodingly in the back of his mind, filling him with doubt and restricting him; that small voice that had always liked the killing; his animalistic side. _She _seemed to be gone. _Her_ spirit, which had invaded him at some point, probably through Hojo's wicked experiments, had wished him to envelop that Jenova specimen and allowing Jenova to rule him completely, vanquishing him from his own mind.

Instead he had placed the spirit back in the body and just before she awoke and wreaked havoc on them in her true form. He had destroyed it. Incinerating seemingly everything. But who knew what that _thing_ could survive.

He woke to slightly more pleasurable thoughts. For one a peacefully slumbering Cloud, still shirtless, was at his side. It was slowly darkening through the window of the motel; he was back in the room he had rented here. Shadows stretched lazily on the wall. But hadn't he destroyed the inn? Perhaps not. Maybe it had miraculously survived his reign of destruction.

Shame enveloped him and almost choked him before Cloud mumbled something that suspiciously sounded like "harder" before he allowed a very small very pleasured smile to slip onto his face. For the first time his eyes lit with it, and almost every bit of strained sadness was gone from him. But only for a moment.

His eyes lingered on Cloud even as he felt the second presense hovering in the shadows by the window. "He risked his life for you, you dirty bastard." There was cold passiveness in those angry words and Sephiroth sat up slightly, painfully grimacing, to lay one hand gently and as softly as possible on Cloud's relaxed shoulders.

His head was pooled on his lap, his warm breath brushing his seemingly naked skin under the sheets. Banishing all evil thoughts his eyes flicked to a nonchalant Zack propped up against the corner between the wall and the window. "I never asked him to-"

"Stop being so fucking selfish Seph, he did it for you, and he's more then happy he did it. Now are you _finally_ going to tell him you want to have him for the rest of your natural-born life and fuck him every night, or do I have to do that too? I had to drag your lazy asses from that wreck, and all the way here to Kalm, and then call in to ShinRa to have them repair the town…you always have to do everything in the extreme don't you? Always gotta have the coolest mental break-down; shit explodes, towns get destroyed, we have some casualties, and some poor small-town girl is traumatised for life." Zack shook his head and cocked a grin. "Always needed all the attention."

Sephiroth stared back at him, eyes full of regret. "Zack, I'm-" Zack's stiff hand and glaring eyes cut off his apology. "I know. But don't apologise to me. All I did was save you from the fire, and put it out. He's the one who's been through emotional torture and absolute destructive stress because of you; you treat him like crap and still he loves you boundlessly. I would _kill_ for that kind of devotion. He's the only one who gets you, ya' know? Can't believe you're too fuckin' dense to figure this out." Zack rolled his eyes and his hand in a circular movement before lifting himself from the wall.

He walked to the door of the Kalm hotel and looked back over his shoulder. He smiled as he saw Sephiroth staring hard and thoughtfully at Cloud and gently rubbing his shoulder. He nodded to himself and began to hum a catchy tune, deciding to leave them to their business.

Cloud mumbled sleepily, this time the suspicious word was followed by a cracking of his eyelids. When his pupils digested he was staring at an awake Sephiroth he shot up, grimacing slightly before he stared, mouth hanging open, eyes wide, skin pale. "You're…" he trailed off, obviously far too emotion-wreaked to say anything more. "Back." Sephiroth finished for him, letting that same smile slip onto his face.

Cloud saw this and his mouth closed to be replaced by a matching smile of his own, his less rusty and more abused then Sephiroth's.

"So what now, _seme_-_kun_?"

He asked, loosing his smile for an uncharacteristically grave face. Sephiroth frowned, not liking that too-mature face on his _uke_. He leaned forward, ignoring the numerous bolts of pain, and kissed him gently, coaxing his tongue into his mouth and sucking on it gently, before he released him and pulled away.

"I don't know, Cloud. I just don't know."

He watched the blissful expression on Cloud's face before it turned to surprise again. "You used my first name! You called me Cloud!" Sephiroth nodded in response to this. "And for once in my until-now insignificant life I have no idea what's going to happen to me tomorrow. I have no idea what I'm going to do. The only thing I do know is that kiss was my official resignation from Shin-Ra. I trust you will follow in my foot-steps?"

A grin was on his face now, a non-psychotic one at that. (For once.) Cloud cocked a grin as well, his much sunnier, and nodded hard. "The only reason I joined was for you. Come to think of it, everything I did was for you. I lov-" Sephiroth cut him off with another possessive, fierce kiss.

His eyes remained open, Cloud's shut in enjoyment, and his eyes trailed downwards to his dream-self's handiwork. He closed his eyes then and began to invent new ways in which to mark his little _uke_ as his forever.

……………………………………………………………………………………………...

END!

AN: Holy crap. It's over. Damn. I was hoping for some more kinky sex, but oh well. You got one last scene out of me, be happy! There is an epilogue. You can't have an alternate ending like this and not explain. Don't worry, I will. Well, this is pretty self-explanatory, but I mean the history of the game etc.. If I tell you anymore you won't read it. Hey, if you like this, and you like vampires, and guy sex and don't mind some kinda weird stuff, in your review ask me to e-mail you my un-finished novel The Coven. It's pretty good, I think, but I have no self-esteem when it comes to my writing, so I need second opinions.

Honestly, inside, my inner voice, is pleading, begging, screaming for you to ask for it, but you don't need to hear/read that. I can barely stand it. Well, it's kinda sad this is the first thing I've somewhat finished on this site. But I refuse to post this without finishing the epilogue so by the time you read this I will be waiting (literally) for my first request for my novel (TPPH!) then I will send out the epilogue. See inner voice wins every time. Sorry, I just really REALLY REALLLLLY wanna publish it, but I have no opinions. Yeah.

So nuff bout other random crap, hope you liked it THANK YOU FOR STICKING WITH ME, SOOOOO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG, I HOPE YOU'VE WALKED AWAY FROM THIS HAPPY (KINDA HORNY ) BUT MOST OF ALL WISER (SOMEHOW). Kay. Done being weird.

Much love and hope for your future yaoi endeavors!

Kurai Tenshi of Doom


	6. Epilogue: Stay With You

Marks

Epilogue:

Let's Run Forever

…………………………

(Cloud's POV)

…………………….

"Is he always like this?" Zack asked eyes riveted to the solitary figure outside the small dirty window. Cloud sighed and pushed a lock of stray hair from his eyes. "Yeah, sometimes; it's like he's there but he isn't you know? I can look into his eyes and wave and he won't come out of it. I usually just wait. I figure it must have something to do with that emptiness all of us feel ever since Nibelheim." He sighed. "But otherwise we're busy doing something or other." Zack grinned and cast twinkling eyes on his friend. "Horny bastards the two of ya'." Cloud flushed and ducked his head down. "Shut up. Anyways, why are you here, it's not like anything's changed since we came."

"Just checking up on the two lovebirds. A quick visit every once in awhile can't hurt right?" Zack shrugged and stood from the lopsided wooden table which took up most of the small cabin. "You sure you're okay with all this? I mean me and Aerith at least have a home now that ShinRa's gone from Midgar." Cloud smiled and raised his head to look into Zack's eyes. "Zack, get the hell out of my house. I'll tell Seph you came."

Zack blew him a kiss then left with a cheery wave and a call of: "Keep it up Cloud and I'll never forgive you for stealing Seph from me!"

…………………………

(Seph's POV)

………………………….

A grassy knoll; grass to the knees and consuming everything; a steady breeze lifting and playing with all it can; and amongst it he stood eyes cast towards the horizon.

Something out there called him, something deep within him he could never define, something pulling; yet made him dig his heels against that pull. It was dreadful whatever it was, and it was his destiny. Why didn't he follow it? What stopped him? Silver brows creased as this thought processed. Yes, why not?

"Seph? What are you staring at?" Sephiroth turned towards the younger man, now in his early twenties and just as seducing and beautiful as the first moment he'd seen him. Those same silver brows softened now. That was why- Cloud. Cloud was his reason for being here, in the middle of Wutai, Cloud was his reason for running from ShinRa, for escaping with shreds of sanity and just barely evading them. They searched for him still.

He gave Cloud a quick smile-something new to him, he was surprised how easily they came after awhile-and turned back to the grassy field. Behind him was a rickety old shack. It was small, one bed, which neither minded, harsh supplies, but it was home and they were proud to call it such.

Zack visited every once in awhile but it was the _other_ visitors that made them all uneasy and yet strangely calm as if their meetings were supposed to be happening; something finally gone right. None of them ever liked Sephiroth. He made them uneasy.

"One is coming." He announced to Cloud. Watching his lovers' face the younger man smiled back and cocked an eyebrow. "Well then I suppose I'll finish off the last of the beef tonight. Listen to me I sound like a freakin' housewife." He shook his head and turned back towards the shack. By nightfall the "other one" had come.

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(Cloud's POV)

"And that's how it happened." Cloud finished eyeing the great red beast sitting calmly at their raggedy table. "I know. I've heard this before, in another life. It really isn't so new. I suppose the others' have visited you as well. You were our leader; we all miss you and the connection we share. Tell me of Yuffie, Barret, Tifa, Cid Highwind, Cait Sith, and Vincent."

"Well Nanaki, to tell the truth all except Vincent have visited. And how do you know all this?" Sephiroth huffed and shifted his leg so one rested on the other. Cloud cast him a look that said: "Be nice" before he focused his attention back onto Nanaki.

"I barely escaped ShinRa and Hojo's experiments, but during those twisted chemicals and tests I discovered a way to view my past lives'. You see we've repeated this life with different paths hundreds of times. In more then a few of my past lives we've battled Jenova and Sephiroth, Jenova controlled, and it always ends in horror and tears. You never forgive yourself for-excuse me-killing Sephiroth. And I, along with the others' who have straggled to find you, are your team members all searching for the reason to this empty hole inside of us. I take it Vincent has yet to be freed from his coffin prison. I must make a note to do that on my way home. Yuffie currently rules Wutai as I've heard, Cait Sith has never come into existence via Reeve who I think has sought you out correct?" Cloud nodded and Nanaki continued.

"Tifa you hold a grudge against even though you saved her life, and she works with Barret still, and has helped to take down ShinRa in Midgar I've also heard. I believe they did it with a small team of terrorists called AVALANCHE. Does this sound familiar?" Cloud nodded again, dumbfounded.

"Yes well, my intention was to see you and be content with your chosen happiness. You are happy, right Cloud?" Cloud looked to Sephiroth and held back a smile to see he was listening intently despite having his head tilted towards the window and the setting sun and leaning back in his chair with arms across his chest.

"More then happy Nanaki. I've never been so happy in my entire life." Sephiroth clicked all four of the chair's feet back onto the floor and Cloud did grin this time, happy with his _seme_'s reaction. Nanaki gave a kitty smile and closed his eyes content.

"Whenever we asked in the past you were always reluctant to answer. When you smiled it was always a sad smile. You were so grave. I'm relieved to see you so happy with your choice. Are you quite satisfied with all this ShinRa business though? I hear you're always on the run?" Cloud smiled warmly and nodded, giving his eternal answer….

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(Cloud's POV)

……………..

"Was he right Cloud? Could that have been our future?" Sephiroth asked as Cloud waved to Nanaki as he crested the horizon. He lowered his hand and his eyes drew themselves into the distance. "I suppose. I think that's what was supposed to happen. But all I know is I'm pretty damn glad I fought for you." He looked to Sephiroth and was surprised to catch him watching him.

He pulled on his sweater sleeve self-consciously. Baggy, black and hanging from one shoulder just like he liked it. Seph was stunning in an outfit much like the one from his dream: white top, open slightly to reveal thin stomach, leather pants.

"Are you sure you don't mind running with me-?" Cloud cut him off by pressing their lips together and smiling as they kissed as passionately as the first time they'd met in the showers.

"Seph, I picked this. And like I told Nanaki…let's run forever." Sephiroth kissed Cloud again and thanked his lucky stars he had gone into the showers that night…..

"_And I'll stay with you_

_The walls will fall before we do_

_So take my hand now, _

_We'll run forever_

_I can feel the storm inside you_

_I'll stay with you…_"

THE END

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AN: To all the dreamers, reviewers and yaoi fans couldn't do it without you! Keep writing!


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